Meme Thread for Both Posting and Discussing Memes
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Yinko
Well-known member
I was looking at a story about a power lifting coach saying he was female for an afternoon so he could demolish the record set by a trans person. So I went, hmm if trans people can take hormones and enter other competitions unfairly, then what can someone do to get around hormone injections for their own group?
PsihoKekec
Swashbuckling Accountant
No, bullies often made things so that the mentally ill people got worse, and became more violent.
The idea that bullies and bullying are 'good' for kids and people who are struggling with mental illness or other personal struggles is pure 'dudebro-science'.
It was bullies that used to make me fantasize about violence in 5th-8th grade.
I always thought, given the time and the opportunity, how I could have been one of the kids who went down that shooter rabbit hole.
I was relentlessly bullied, a campaign of bullying, teachers didn't care or joined in.
Life was miserable. Every day was torture.
My parents put me in a different school system when I started high school, and my entire life turned around.
Nothing excuses shooting up a school, ever, period. But being the recipient of that kind of behavior has showed me how someone csn go down that path.
That being said, I was a socially awkward fuck, I was not around children enough when I was younger and so my socialization process turned into that horrendous nightmare that I couldn't escape even after correcting my behavior.
When I started the new school, I started it with those important social lessons in place and got along great with people.
I don't want anyone to ever have to go through that bullying, but it made me stronger. Now as an adult, I'm socially functional and strong, and generally the one who keeps his cool in chaotic situations.
Anyways I went on a bit of a diatribe there. What I mean to say is that I agree with you. I was able to turn my bullying into strength, but it took a lot of painful work. I would have been better off if my parents had put more work into socializing me young.
Skallagrim
Well-known member
Bullying is not a good thing. The poblem here is that the over-correction is coddling, and that's quite literally just as bad. It also fucks you up. In fact, it may even be worse. Bullying, in some cases, can ultimately make you stronger (although in a really unpleasant and inefficient way). Coddling can never help you.
Consider it like exposure to disease. Bullying is like just blanket-infecting everybody and giving them zero treatment and if you perish, fuck you. Coddling is like systematically ensuring that people are never exposed to any germ of any kind... and then dumping them in the real world, where germs exist, to which they have zero resistance-- meaning near-100% fatality.
You need a healthy system of exposure, where people build up resistance and grow stronger. The "social" equivalent of that isn't bullying, but active team-building. And not like that modern bullshit, but like in an old-fashioned way. If someone isn't socially well-adjusted, then only way to change that is to include them in stuff. Find out what they're good at, and can become good at, and start fostering that.
What you need is the "one of us" mentality. You need tribalism. That weird epileptic kid is bound to make a good shaman, right? That's how the ancestors did it.
Consider it like exposure to disease. Bullying is like just blanket-infecting everybody and giving them zero treatment and if you perish, fuck you. Coddling is like systematically ensuring that people are never exposed to any germ of any kind... and then dumping them in the real world, where germs exist, to which they have zero resistance-- meaning near-100% fatality.
You need a healthy system of exposure, where people build up resistance and grow stronger. The "social" equivalent of that isn't bullying, but active team-building. And not like that modern bullshit, but like in an old-fashioned way. If someone isn't socially well-adjusted, then only way to change that is to include them in stuff. Find out what they're good at, and can become good at, and start fostering that.
What you need is the "one of us" mentality. You need tribalism. That weird epileptic kid is bound to make a good shaman, right? That's how the ancestors did it.
You're right, and it goes deeper than just that.
My bullying was probably a direct result of my parents coddling me.
I got both ends of it and landed in the middle, in a healthy spot after a while.
more and more we find out that our ancestors were quite a bit wiser then we gave them credit for and that we are not nearly as smart as we think ourselves.
DarthOne
☦️
Agreed and what I was trying to say.
To clarify on my last post, bullying is corrective behavior.
But if it gets that far, that means something went wrong somewhere.
Parents who don't overly coddle and socialize their children? Those children get the corrective lessons from their parents, and ALSO corrective behavior from other young children when they learn to play.
Kids that miss out on these early behavioral lessons get them later. And they are much more harsh later in life.
Blasterbot
Well-known member
I disagree. while bullying can go too far it is something encoded into people for a reason. it is something that tells you "that guy isn't playing along with the rules of the tribe". can it go too far? absolutely. but completely ignoring that warning bell screaming that this guy is not right leads to negative outcomes as well.
LordsFire
Internet Wizard
That meme conflates teasing/mild shunning for anti-social behavior with outright bullying.
If you've done something stupid, some light teasing for it is natural, and can be healthy as a way of encouraging you not to do it again. Good-natured banter when you're not keeping up with others in a common task or competition can help motivate you to do better.
Being deliberately excluded from the common social group when you're habitually doing something anti-social, like creeping at the girls, constantly trying to dominate conversation, practicing egregiously poor hygiene, etc, is not just acceptable, it's good and needed. It's very important that the exclusion stops once the bad behavior stops though, so there's both negative and positive reinforcement.
Outright bullying is when you take these things and twist them instead into tools for people to put others down to inflate their own self-worth and perceived social status. That is not healthy or acceptable for anyone.
A complicating factor about this is that a lot of the time bullies would bully other kids for things that the other kids shouldn't be doing, or things they were doing but should be doing better, so people conflate these things a lot.
If you've done something stupid, some light teasing for it is natural, and can be healthy as a way of encouraging you not to do it again. Good-natured banter when you're not keeping up with others in a common task or competition can help motivate you to do better.
Being deliberately excluded from the common social group when you're habitually doing something anti-social, like creeping at the girls, constantly trying to dominate conversation, practicing egregiously poor hygiene, etc, is not just acceptable, it's good and needed. It's very important that the exclusion stops once the bad behavior stops though, so there's both negative and positive reinforcement.
Outright bullying is when you take these things and twist them instead into tools for people to put others down to inflate their own self-worth and perceived social status. That is not healthy or acceptable for anyone.
A complicating factor about this is that a lot of the time bullies would bully other kids for things that the other kids shouldn't be doing, or things they were doing but should be doing better, so people conflate these things a lot.
Terthna
Professional Lurker
Oh no; I'd argue there's enormous pressure to conform right now. It's just that what we're all demanded to conform to, is monstrous.