Stupidest Warning label you have seen?

Emperor Tippy

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So we've all seen the stupid warning labels/instructions that make you ask "What happened to cause them to specifically add that warning?"; so whare are the best ones that you have seen.

My best is an old VCR, its manual said "Do not stick penis in video slot."
 

Duke Nukem

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So we've all seen the stupid warning labels/instructions that make you ask "What happened to cause them to specifically add that warning?"; so whare are the best ones that you have seen.

My best is an old VCR, its manual said "Do not stick penis in video slot."


This warning is oddly specific.. almost as if it has happened before.
 

Harlock

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A Batman fancy dress outfit warned 'Cape does not allow wearer to fly' which was doubly confusing as Batman doesn't use a cape to fly anyway :p
He uses fat piles of cash.
 

Urabrask Revealed

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This warning is oddly specific.. almost as if it has happened before.
Well, there was that case in Africa when three brothers died while trying to rape a crocodile.
That, and there's Florida Man who tried to use a crocodile that failed to kill him as a sex slave. He was quoted as "That's what happens when you fail to kill me! I will make you my bitch!" or something along these lines.
 

gral

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It's similar in EU, where all alergens have to be declared, like eggs in eggs and so on.
It's worse than that, the law makes you declare your stuff DOESN'T have the allergen. I can understand, having to declare your stuff has shit that fucks people up, even when it's somewhat obvious(like gluten on common bread). Having gluten-free tags on mineral water bottles is high-grade idiocy, though.
 

Jormungandr

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You guys do know that "molest" is just a synonym for "disturb" right?
Yes, but modern connotations imply that something forcibly sexual occurred.

For example, "gay" technically still means "happy", but when you hear someone say, "I feel so gay!"... yeah. :ROFLMAO:

"Bastard"? An insult, but it still legitimately means "mother or father couldn't keep it in their pants/legs closed outside their marriage, so they had an illegitimate son/daughter".

This is pretty hilarious because people on Reddit get seriously triggered by the correct usage of this term ("please call them illegitimate children instead"). Fucking lol.

There are also regional contexts: "Jap" in America and Japan, for example, is a slur sourced from WWII: in the UK, it's literally (or rather usually) just short for "Japanese" -- same deal with "Paki" for "Pakistani", or "Scots" for "Scotsman".

"Faggot" is the name of a (disgusting) sausage and something else, IIRC, but now it's, in context, either a slur against homosexual people or a general, juvenile insult hurled at people (mostly from young teens and tweens) over a game's voice or text-chat.

"Fag"? Slur in America: "Cigarette" over here. It's a common bit of confusion with American tourists in the UK and vice-versa.

"Yank"? Big insult in Southern USA, due to the Civil War and all (used to refer to Northern USA people, IIRC), but in the UK? Just slang for an American, regardless of their location.

Hell, the old saying "going down the Paki shop" came about because Muslim-owned Pakistani corner-shops that sold eggs, milk, and bread were open on Sundays.

Unfortunately, people have become so hypersensitive these days that they throw around "istaphobes" constantly.
 
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