Thus Buzzes the Babylon Bee

I kind of like the idea of more red states possibly joining, but the sad fact is the prairie provinces would probably end up like Minnesota since they have very blue cities at their core.
 
I would like to note that sucession is legal in Canada and Albertia and the parries are fully allowed to just leave to avoid this shit. And once the Paries are not around to pay the bribes quebec is probally next. Trudue in all likelyhood might go down in history as the man who killed canada.
Logical end.Canada have sense only as long as they were subjects of England Kings.Now,when they decided that they do not kings,nothing more keep country together.
 

Basically a true story now.
 
NotTheBee has made an interesting point about the AOC Abuela situation:


The point being that government bailouts couldn't help AOC's Abuela, according to AOC herself. But in 12 hours, private charity was able to raise a hundred grand. Private charity works where government bailouts don't.
 
The Babylon Bee doesn't seem to consider the implications of this:

Personally, I have no issue with this. What they infiltrated was going to exist regardless. The confidential informer came forward and exposed the business early in its creation, the FBI just made sure that that business was the one that succeeded.

And because it was designed to be used by criminals, I have even less of an issue. This is hugely better than them just reading everyone's emails.
 
Okay, so it *isn't* a massive entrapment clusterfuck, they ended up in contact with someone who was already making it and then the FBI helped make it work out so they'd have a high-quality informant.
 
Okay, so it *isn't* a massive entrapment clusterfuck, they ended up in contact with someone who was already making it and then the FBI helped make it work out so they'd have a high-quality informant.
Even if the FBI created it themselves, still not entrapment, unless they are being prosecuted for using an encrypted messaging app, as opposed to what they said while on it. Now maybe it's a 4th amendment violation, but I doubt that.
 

1. Re-drain the swamp. - There's been a lot of swamp build-up over the past few months -- time to start re-draining!
2. Nuke a blue state as a warning to the rest of the blue states. - California will do nicely.
3. Un-gay the military. - Trump says he will make the military the straightest it's ever been!
4. Sign an executive order bringing back Aunt Jemima, Mr. Potato Head, and Uncle Ben. - Wow! Promises made, promises kept!
5. Lock up Hillary but for real this time. - Lock her up, but actually do it!
6. Order ten new seasons of Firefly. - A move that will gain our true president real bipartisan support.
7. Build 500 new pipelines making gas plummet to a dime a gallon. - It's a foolproof plan.
8. Jail everyone involved in The Last Jedi - Starting with the ringleader Rian Johnson.
9. Make America great again again. - There's a lot of work to do to make America great again, again, but Trump is up to the job. Again.
10. Wipe away every tear. - He will also make the lion lie down with the lamb.
We. Can't. Wait!
 
Good,good,but where is harem of catgirls for every american who voted for him? or,at least,french maid.
 

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