[RWBY] Cuts of RWBY

Cowboys of Remnant
- - -

Radian, North Sanus

- - -

"I tell ya Nick, it's a damn catastrophe!"

Jaune peeked into the family kitchen, his eyes wide. The thirteen year old was used to tall men: His father was nearly seven foot tall, same with his grandfather. Yet here was a man who could barely fit into their kitchen, sitting across the table from his dad.

He was built broad and brawny, with a face weathered by the sun. His eyes were deep blue, his hair was silver brown. His chin was like a lantern made of solid brass. He wore riding leathers, khaki, black, and yellow. A red scarf was tied around his neck, and he wore a tall gray ten gallon hat. A revolver hung from his belt, and a shotgun over his back. He sipped his beer, the same as his father.

"All your hands just up and quit, huh?" Nick asked sympathetically. The tall man nodded.

"Mm. A new Dust Mine opened up, and they all went to go work for the Schnees instead of me! ME! Most of 'em I taught the cattle business when they were no taller than a damn fence post! All my cattle are ready to go down to Bulwark, and they just up and leave!"

"Well, you didn't exactly help your case, Rooster Duke," Isabel observed, sipping some tea at the other kitchen door, "You had a few hands willing to work, if you let them go up to the Schnee mines to see how the work was."

Rooster snorted.

"If you can't trust a man in safety, you can't trust them in the Grimm infested wilds. I've seen men turn tail at the hint of a Beowulf, where only hours before they'd sworn everything to the job in the bar. No, no..."

"You could wait until next year," Nick suggested. "A lot of ranchers wait every two years for a drive."

Rooster huffed.

"Lot of ranchers get fat off government money. Paid to not grow, to not work, all for some politician's pocketbook. Ain't for me, Nick. And it ain't for either of you, even in an old town like this."

Nick smirked. Isabel nodded slowly.

"No more than we have to," Isabel agreed. "So, why are you here?"

"I need hands, and I need Hunters," Rooster stated flatly. "I can pay you top rate, Nick, you're worth it. I can't pay you until we get to Bulwark, but it'll be worth your while."

Nick looked to Isabel. She smiled at him.

"The training school is closed for the season, and I think Sarge can run the militia for a few months without you," Isabel observed.

"Guess I'm your man," Nick chuckled. "As for hands... Well. Mercer Sith is off school. Orchid can handle a horse. The Gaffer boy is old enough."

"Kids?" Rooster made a face. Nick shrugged.

"You got any better ideas?"

Rooster scowled harder. He sighed.

"Ain't like I got much choice, God help me." He looked over. "What about your son?"

His parents looked over, and Jaune winced. Her walked out into the open.

"He's too young-" Isabel started. Jaune shook his head.

"I can ride a horse, and handle a rope, sir," Jaune stated. "I also know how to shoot a gun, though I want to use a sword."

"He ain't even had his Aura unlocked," Rooster growled.

"I'm hoping he'll take after his mother and become a doctor," Nick said. Jaune shook his head.

"Dad, Mom... If Mister Duke needs a hand? I'll be a hand. Let me help."

Nick hummed. Isabel shook her head.

"Nick, please-!"

"It's his decision," Nick stated calmly. Rooster stared at him, hard, with those brilliant blue eyes. It felt like a knife was cutting right through him. Jaune stood his ground.

"I want to protect people, and fight the Grimm," he said, "And working as a hand on your drive will help me do it."

"It won't be easy, and I'll drive you until you can't even see straight," Rooster stated, cold and hard, "It will be rough and tough. No breaks, not even on Sundays. But if you can make it, boy... You'll be paid well in lien, and you'll be a man. What do you say?"

Jaune glanced over at his parents. Isabel frowned deeply. She looked to Rooster.

"You'll keep him safe?"

"I'll teach him to keep himself safe," he grunted. Nick nodded grimly.

"We'll keep him safe, Isabel, I swear."

Isabel sighed. She looked to Jaune.

"Is this really what you want?"

"Yes Mom, it is," Jaune said.

Isabel slowly nodded. Rooster looked to Jaune.

"Well then, Mister Arc," Rooster stated, holding out his hand, "Welcome aboard the Duke Ranch Company."

Jaune shook Rooster's hand. The grip was stronger than steel, but Jaune held back his wince.

"Yes sir!"

- - -

I am a huge fan of John Wayne, and his westerns. And hell, people still gotta eat. While railroads would let you get cattle to many major cities, like today, you'd still need to do cattle drives to move cattle around. They'd require Hunter protection, and cow hands.

So basically you could do some Western-style stories in Remnant.

Rooster Duke is naturally named for John Wayne's role in "True Grit" and John Wayne's nickname "The Duke".
Cowboys of Remnant 2
Two years later...

- - -

Ruby Rose trudged around Beacon in tears. First her older sister had abandoned her right as they touched down, then some snooty white-haired girl had blown her up with some Dust and yelled at her, and now... Now...!

"Now I'm lost!" Ruby wailed, looking around her surroundings. There were some old stone stables painted in white and green, the scent of horse and manure in the air. There were some paddocks and fences around, and a gorgeous view of Vale proper.

She hadn't thought Beacon would have stables, but she stood corrected. She sighed and bowed her head.

"Not where I want to be," she muttered.

A few notes from a guitar filled the air. She blinked and walked over to one of the stables. She looked in curiously.

She met a horse: A rich, chestnut mare with inquisitive eyes. Ruby yelped as the horse whinnied at her.

"Easy, Orleans, easy," a male voice said easily. She looked over in the other stable. A blond boy, two years older than her, sat on a hay bale. He was thumbing his guitar. He wore a black wide brimmed stetson on his head. He wore old white armor over a black shirt and dark blue pants. His boots were rugged and worn, but tough leather. A revolver hung from his belt on his right side, while a sword hung from the left. A well woven blue and white poncho hung over his shoulders. He looked at her with intense blue eyes.

Ruby flushed.

"Well miss, you appear to be lost," the young man said with a polite smile.

"I am, on my first day here at Beacon," Ruby sighed. The young man snapped his fingers and put his guitar aside.

"Oh, damn. I forgot all about that," he muttered. He stood up. "Begging your pardon, miss. I can get you right to Orientation, don't you worry."

"You can?!" Ruby gasped happily. The boy nodded.

"Sure can," he said. "My name's Jaune Arc, what's yours?"

"R-Ruby Rose!" Ruby said cheerfully. "It-It's great to meet you!"

Jaune smiled.


He hopped over the stable door, and walked over to his horse. He patted her as she neighed in frustration.

"Now now, Orly, I'll be back here soon, promise," Jaune said. Orly huffed but seemed appeased. He looked over at Ruby and offered his arm.

"Shall we, Miss Rose?"

"O-Oh! Yes!" Ruby stuttered, blushing hard. "Um... Wh-Where do I...?"

Jaune reached out and took her hands. He gently put them around his bicep and smiled.

"O-Oh," Ruby mumbled, "Um..."

"I know it's a bit old fashioned, Miss Rose, but it will ensure you don't get lost," Jaune said with a smile.

"N-No! I really appreciate it!" Ruby said. "I-I like old fashioned! Like... Um... That revolver! It's a Smith and Winston 686!"

"Yes miss," Jaune nodded, guiding Ruby up the path.

"And that shotgun! A Winchester 76! They're classics! Any mechashift options?"

"'Fraid not," Jaune said, "They're a little too finicky for my taste. Sides, I switch to my sword if I run outta rounds."

"But-But mechashift weapons are the coolest!" Ruby insisted. Jaune nodded.

"I'm sure yours is amazing, Miss Rose. But dust and grime gets in the works and suddenly, your gun can't shift into anything else."

Ruby pouted up at him.

"Maybe if they do it wrong, but I can do it right!"

Jaune nodded and chuckled quietly.

"I'd be happy to see you do it, Miss Rose."

"You can just call me Ruby, you know," Ruby insisted. "I-I mean... If we're friends, and all? Er... If we can be friends?"

Jaune smiled.

"I'd be happy to be your friend, Miss Rose."


"That may take some getting used to, Miss Rose."

Ruby groaned.

They made it to the orientation hall, a large auditorium filled with chattering students. Ruby beamed.

"Oh, thank you Jaune! Uh... Um... So will I get to see you around?"

Jaune nodded.

"I expect so. You're a new student, ain'tcha?"


Jaune beamed and winked.

"So am I."

Ruby gasped.

"You... You are?!"

"Yes miss." Jaune shook his head. "I near plum forgot it was orientation day! Thanks for that!"

"Wha..." Ruby gaped. "Have you been living in the stable? How long?"

"Well... I had to take the long way with Orly. I wasn't going to leave her behind," Jaune said. He then shrugged. "About two weeks?"

He smiled.

"Hey, hunting's all done outdoors, right?"

Ruby blinked, then giggled.

"Oh geez... You're... You're kind of weird, aren't you Jaune?"

Jaune shrugged.

"If you say so, Miss Rose. But would it be all right for us to be weird together?"

Ruby beamed.


"Works for me..."

- - -

Jaune after a few cattle drives is a bit less blinded by romance and a bit more wild in some ways. But he's still Jaune Arc. Still a bit of a dork. Much better with a gun than a sword.

Since most people in Remnant don't have Aura, you gotta rely on guns with Dust. And you gotta be a damn good shot. So Jaune got a lot of practice.
Jaune from Western - i like it.And,maybe Ruby made him winchester which could change into sword !
I've developed something like that for a fic, I basically turned Crocea Mors into a Qualta blade. But a Winchester/Sword sounds awesome.

Also there is this to contemplate
Auntie Xian Pu
Yang cringed at her opponent. She held up her hands and smiled desperately.

"H-Hey... Vomit Boy, I mean, Jaune... Can't we talk this out?"

Jaune stared at his opponent coldly. Yang's grin became a bit more pleading.

"I-I mean, we could work something out... I could be very appreciative... Very, very appreciative! If you just let this slide?'

Jaune smirked, his eyes cold and deadly.

"Yes, you will be. But I find it better to put you on your knees in such a way you will never think of rising against me again. That your submission was inevitable, necessary... Even desired. For in your defeat, you realize you never stood a chance, and have found your proper place."

"Give in, Yang," Ruby agreed, "There's no stopping him."

"Submission is really the best choice," Pyrrha added, beaming in bliss.

Yang flushed.

"N-No, Jaune, please-!"

"I hear a no... But I know what it really means," Jaune purred. He reached out...

And slammed his army unit down on the map of Remnant: The Board Game. Yang covered her face as she joined her sister and Pyrrha in total defeat.


"YESSS!" Jaune cackled, "I am the Lord of all Remnant once again!"

"Great job, Jaune!" Pyrrha said genuinely, and Jaune dropped his Conqueror's persons to blush modestly.

"Aw, thanks Pyrrha. Good game guys."

"How in the hell do you keep winning?" Yang demanded.

"Years of practice," Jaune chuckled. Yang sighed and cracked her knuckles.

"Fine. I'll train you in hand to hand. But I'm not going easy on you, VB!"

"Good," Jaune smirked, "I'd prefer the hard way with you."

"Oh trust me, I'll make it the hardest," Yang hissed.

"Geez, can you two stop flirting?" Nora complained from another table, "I'm trying to flirt with Ren!"

Yang and Jaune both went bright red. Pyrrha gaped. Ruby flushed as well.

"W-We're not flirting!" They both insisted at the same time.

"Y-Yes! They're friends! Just friends!" Pyrrha and Ruby insisted at the same time. Everyone gave eachother strange looks.

"I'm totally convinced," Cardin deadpanned from another table.

"Shut up you tsundere!" Yang shouted back. Cardin went bright red.

"I am not tsundere! I-I hate Faunus and I wasn't thinking about Velvet's eyes!"

Silence. Someone cleared their throat behind Cardin. He turned and made a choking sound as Velvet stared at him.

"Um... W-What about my eyes?" She asked.

Cardin choked.

"Knew it," Weiss sighed, "I have my issues with Faunus but he is so obvious..."

Cardin tried to speak... When the wall behind him exploded in a cloud of debris. A piece of the wall smacked him in the head, sending him toppling into the very surprised Velvet's lap. Everyone else stood up, ready for a fight, as a female figure entered.

She was all curves and muscle, like a Mistralian tiger. Her hair was light purple and well brushed. Her legs were long and covered by white silk pants, while she wore an elegant violet Mistralian style cheongsam over it. Her keen eyes locked onto Yang and Ruby... And she smiled.

"YANG! RUBY! AUNTIE IS HERE!" She cried in broken English, grabbing up both girls and hugging them tightly to her bosom.

"HURK! H-Hey, Aunt Shampoo!" Yang managed, struggling against the hug.

"So good to see you!" Ruby gasped.

Glynda Goodwitch walked in through the hole in the wall and scowled.

"Miss Xiao-Long-!"

"Mrs. Saotome," Shampoo replied, holding up a ring, "Unlike you, have husband. And children."

Goodwitch's glare could have melted down a Bullhead.

"Was it necessary to go through the wall?!"

"Yes," Shampoo said.

- - -

Yes, the silliness definitely went up before Shampoo showed up. That was intentional.

Shampoo is Taiyang's sister and loves her brother very much. She always hated Raven but loved Summer. She tolerates Qrow.
"Mrs. Saotome," Shampoo replied, holding up a ring, "Unlike you, have husband. And children."

Goodwitch's glare could have melted down a Bullhead.

"Was it necessary to go through the wall?!"

"Yes," Shampoo said.
It feels like she is rubbing it in her face on purpose. I now think Glynda got caught up trying to get with Ranma at one point.
It feels like she is rubbing it in her face on purpose. I now think Glynda got caught up trying to get with Ranma at one point.
Yep,Glynda would try to catch husband now even more.What about Jaune ?
Would Pyrrha and Ruby agree to share?

See in next issue !
Granny Xiao-Long
So, since I made Shampoo Yang and Ruby's aunt, it seems logical to have their grandmother on Taiyang's side be based on another Chinese badass. So I pick the landlady from Kung Fu Hustle:


That said, she's got a fair amount of Cologne's influence in her.

Granny Long looks over the boys of Beacon.

Cardin: "Who brought the old hag?"

Granny Long: WHAM

Cardin: "URK!"

Jaune: "I'm the first to admit I'm not at all worldly, and I still know the rule about acting incautiously when confronting smiling older ladies."

Granny Long: "I looked like Little Yang until I was eighty, you sassy little thing!"

Cardin: "And how many centuries ago was that?"

Granny Long: (WHAM) "Two." (WHAM) "For flinching."

Cardin: "URK!"


Granny Long: looking at Ren and Jaune "Orphan boy, wish I'd found you sooner. You'd have been great grandson-in-law and student!"

Ren: "Thank you?"

Granny Long: looks at Jaune "You powerful, full of potential, and dumb! Perfect grandson-in-law material!"

Jaune: "No I'm... Isn't!"

Granny Long: "Granddaughters! You can date these two! Get on with it, Yang, make me great-grandchildren!"


Granny Long: "You not thinking of Kitty Brat, are you?"

Yang: "What, no! I've have to get my arm cut off to think about dating Blake!"

Jaune: "I... Is that a sex thing or... What?"

Granny Long: "Good! Got two choices for grandson-in-law!"

Yang: "I'm just not interested in that, Granny!"

Granny Long: "When you be interested? When you too old to attract anyone?"


Granny Long: "Would be old maid in my day! Had ten boys fighting for me when I was your age!"

Yang: "I mean I want to see the world, have adventures-"

Granny Long: "Had adventures while married and pregnant too! Beat up warlord and his tribe while your auntie was in me!"

Yang: "Is that why she talks like that-" WHAM "OW!"

Granny Long: "No, her husband just think she cute like that. Don't be rude!"

Yang: "I'm not getting married just because you're being pushy!"

Granny Long: "You wanna end up like Goodwitch?"

Yang: "What, a total badass?"

Granny Long: "She lives in tiny apartment. Has cat. Sometimes accidentally eats cat food when she's all alone!"

Goodwitch: "How did you-I DID NOT! THAT'S RIDICULOUS!"

Yang: "I... Seriously? Wow. Still not gonna get married when I'm barely EIGHTEEN!"

Granny Long: "Fine! Ruby! You be good granddaughter and date blond idiot!"

Ruby: "Okay!"

Yang: "GRANNY!"

Granny Long: "Fine, you date blond idiot. I'll see if I can find someone suitable for her. You might have to share."


Granny Long: "This Jaune-boy is one of only two respectful males in this heap of rubble. You don't want him, not gonna let Ruby miss out. You can have Quiet Polite One!"

Nora: "NOBODY'S TAKING REN FROM ME!" Manic, holding up her hammer as lightning crackles around her

Granny Long: "Oh really? You kill for him?"


Granny Long: "You orphan?"

Nora: "YES!"

Granny Long: "Not anymore! Welcome to family! You adopted now!"


Granny Long: hugs her "Granddaughter!"

Yang, Ren, Jaune, and Ruby: "What."

Granny Long: "I like her spunk!"
Fake Boyfriend
Cardin Winchester was trying. He really was trying to not be a jerkass. He'd recognized how much of a jerkass he was and he was making amends.

He'd apologized to Velvet, and while it took a lot of effort, she at least was willing to speak to him. Her team wasn't glaring death at him. It was a start, but it was a good one. He thought he was doing okay, honestly. Sure, they weren't exactly friends but at least they didn't hate each other.

All of this went through Cardin's mind as he saw Velvet hurry up to him as he sat studying under a tree on the quad. He blinked at her through the harsh midday sun as she came to a stop right in front of him, panting hard.

"... Something I can help you with?" He asked.

Velvet nodded quickly.

"Y-Yes... Um... Stand up?"

Cardin blinked.


"Please?" Velvet asked, pressing her hands together as though in desperate prayer. Her pleading look helped.

Damnit why does she have to be so damn cute? He thought grumpily as he stood up. He spread his arms out, feeling a bit annoyed.

"Okay? Now what?"

"Wrap your arms around me," Velvet ordered. Cardin blinked.


"Just do it, please?" Velvet begged. Cardin sighed, and reached out to take her in an awkward hug, his arms staying straight. Velvet rolled her eyes in frustration.

"Oh for...!"

She reached up, wrapped her arms around his neck, and pushed herself up on tippy toes to kiss him. His eyes bulged out as her warm lips met his and electricity went right through him.

What is this?! Why is she doing this?! WHY IS THIS AMAZING?! He thought frantically, but everything else was overridden by his teenaged hormones which all screamed:


Velvet broke the kiss (DAMNIT ME WANT MORE KISSU! His hormones screamed) before she turned and scowled over her shoulder. Cardin dazedly followed her gaze. His eyes narrowed.

Hex Skvader was a rabbit Faunus too. He had dark black hair, black ears pointed like knives, green eyes, and a smug pretty boy face that just seemed to beg to get punched. He was another upperclassman who was, quite frankly, a dick. Which was saying something coming from Cardin.

Honestly, he was glad he'd stopped his bullying when he did because Hex made him look like a saint.

"What... You... How could you... With a human?!" Hex sputtered.

"He's my boyfriend and we're very happy together!" Velvet growled, leaning into Cardin. His arms instinctively wrapped more tightly around her. The outraged look on Hex's face as he glared at them. At Velvet. There was a possessiveness in his eyes, a childish anger over not getting what he wanted.

Cardin couldn't help but enjoy the idea of this smug prick not getting what he wanted.

"Yeah, so beat it, Jackass," Cardin sneered.

Hex worked his jaw.

"Is he blackmailing you?" He demanded. "This smug human prick abusing you-?"

"NO! I-I care for him! So back off already!" Velvet growled. She elbowed Cardin a bit, and, anti-faunus or not anti-faunus, he mustered some spine at Hex's sneer.

"She told you, back off, twink."

"Twink?!" Hex growled. "I'm manlier than a shaved ape like you could ever be!"

"And yet," Cardin stated, "She's choosing me. Not you."

Hex gritted his teeth. He turned and stormed off, muttering curses under his breath. They watched him go for a while, and Cardin's brain pointed out all sorts of great things about holding Velvet! She was warm, soft, curvy and-

She pushed away, breathing a sigh of relief. She smiled up at him apologetically.

"Um... S-Sorry," she managed, "I uh... I was out of ideas to get him off my back."

WHY HOT BUNNY GIRL NOT HUG NO MORE?! Cardin's hindbrain demanded. Cardin coughed.

"I uh... M-Maybe some warning next time...?"

Velvet blushed.

"I... Yeah... I-I was looking for Yatsuhashi but uh..."

"Yatsuhashi?!" Cardin blurted out. Velvet blinked.

"What? What's wrong with him?"

HE'S NOT ME! ME WANT HOT BUNNY GIRL! His hormones crowed. Cardin coughed and rubbed the back of his neck.

"I-I mean... It... Would make things on your team awkward, wouldn't it?" He tried.

Velvet coughed, and looked to the side.

"I-I mean... Maybe a little," she said, "I... But we're a little-"

"Hey, uh... I'm... Trying to turn over a new leaf, right?" Cardin suggested quickly. "I... I'm fine with helping you out. I should help you out."

Velvet frowned.

"You sure? It's... I mean, you're not exactly fond of us..."

HOT BUNNY GIRRRRRL! His hindbrain bellowed.

"I uh... I-I'm... Changing my opinions," Cardin clarified nervously, "As I... Get to know you better. Sides... Um... Again... I want to do some good."

Velvet beamed. Cardin's heart practically sang.


"Y-Yeah!" Cardin said, giving her a thumbs up, "I um... I'm willing to help you however you need me to! Even... Even being a fake boyfriend!"

"I..." Velvet nodded. "Okay... I... Thank you. I'm sorry if it's gonna be hard on you."

"You have no idea," Cardin muttered.



- - -
In Oobleck's class...

Oobleck: "As a Huntsman, while you belong to an apolitical system across all four kingdoms, politics is nevertheless a variable you will have to deal with at some point! Many prominent politicians were former Huntsmen or Huntresses, while others have a very negative view of us! You must be aware of the political situation as best you can! To ease you into this topic, we will be watching notable moments from the Valean Council minutes from the last session! Please make notes on anything that catches your interest!"

Yang: "Aw man... This is gonna suuuck..."

Weiss: "Pay attention! This is vitally important!"

Jaune: *sigh* "I hate to say it but she's right. My mom talked about politics at home all the time because of her job. It is important."

Yang: "So, can I bum some notes off you, Ladykiller?"

Nora: "Hey! His team gets bumming rights first!"

Weiss: "Shush! It's starting!"

The screen shows the Valean Council chambers... And several politicians are fighting furiously.

Weiss: "... I... Wha...?"

Pyrrha: "Is it the wrong channel?"

Oobleck: 'It is not! This is a brawl that broke out over Bill 204.9, over tariffs and the trading Treaty with Menagerie! As you can see, Councilman Winchester is grappling with Councilman Uzi over work permit limits for foreign nationals-OH! A RIGHT HOOK! A LEFT HOOK! AND-CAN IT BE? WINCHESTER'S GOT HIM IN A HOLD AND-YES! PILEDRIVER! PILEDRIVVVER!"

Cardin: "GO DAD!"

Councilman Winchester piledrives Uzi right through a wooden table. Uzi then gets up when Winchester's back is turned, and tackles him from behind right through another desk.

Cardin: "Oh, what?! BOO!"

Oobleck: "Yes, the Party Whip had to get involved for that one!"

Weiss: *staring in horror* "This is Valean politics?!"

Jaune: "Well they outlawed actual weapons in chambers but yeah, pretty much."

Yang: *grins* "I have a new career goal."
Piledrives through wooden table,but he still stand and tackles through another desk.Both must be Aura users.
I would pay to watch such brawl,and i think,that people without Aura have no chances in Vale politics.

P.S Yang would be great politician there.
Pyrrha and Jaune had returned to the dormroom after enough training session on the roof. Jaune groaned a bit as Pyrrha helped support him through the door into the dorm.

"Thanks Pyrrha," Jaune managed, "Ugh... I feel like I got hit by a truck."

Pyrrha blushed then smiled.

"Um, sorry..."

"No! No, that's good," Jaune said with a nod, "No pain... Ugh... No gain, r-right?"

"Well, I wouldn't say that's entirely untrue," Pyrrha said gently, "Though you have been getting a lot better."

"Yay," Jaune sighed. Pyrrha smiled encouragingly at him.

"No, really! You have improved a LOT!" She said happily. "You shouldn't be so hard on yourself."

"Trying, but it's how I've been since I can remember," Jaune sighed. They stopped in front of Jaune's bed. Pyrrha frowned deeply, studying the bed carefully. Jaune looked at her, and then back at the bed.

"Uh... You okay Pyr?" He asked. Pyrrha flushed and nodded quickly.

"O-Oh! Yes! J-Just fine! Um... Hmm..."

Jaune cast about in his mind for things that might bother Pyrrha.

His bed was spic and span, he made it properly every morning... That couldn't be it... So...

He decided to take a shot in the dark.

"Is it about the Dance?" Jaune asked. Pyrrha turned bright red.

"Um, er, uh... S-Sort of?" She managed. Jaune blinked.

Damn. She looked cute when she was nervous. It was nice to see, to be honest. Sure, she was gorgeous, but this felt more... Real, somehow.

"Well, don't worry about it," Jaune said with a grin, "You'll gonna have to beat the boys off with Milo! So many of them are going to want to ask you out!"

Pyrrha fidgeted and looked aside.

"Oh... Um... Y-Yeah, you bet," she murmured quietly.

Jaune frowned.

"What, you think otherwise?"

"It's just... Um... Well, the big reason is that uh... I-I mean... I think I intimidate a lot of people," she admitted.

Jaune stared.

"Really? I..." He thought about it. "Oh... Um, I guess that makes sense. You being a celebrity and all."

"Y-yeah," Pyrrha said quietly, "You... You're one of the few people I've met who can actually... Y-You know... Talk to me like I'm a person."

Jaune smiled widely.

"Well, you are. To me. A great person!"

Pyrrha's cheeks burned an even brighter red. She seemed a bit unsteady. Concerned, Jaune forgot about his fatigue and reached out to her.

"Pyr? You okay-?"


Pyrrha tried to move her foot forward, while Jaune moved his back. She grabbed hold of his hand and he was pulled forward as he remembered how tired he was. The end result of this lack of coordination was predictable if you've ever watched romcom anime.



Jaune landed on his bed, on his back. The pain of his aching muscles was again forgotten as Pyrrha laid on top of him. Her wide green eyes stared into his wide blue ones as she perched atop him.

Her face soon turned as red as her hair, and her lip wobbled. Jaune took a deep breath to calm himself.

After all, this was his friend Pyrrha. They'd just fallen together. Nevermind his rapidly beating heart or his red cheeks, he was not going to freak out. Not when Pyrrha looked close to tears.

"Pyrrha, are you okay?" He asked.

Pyrrha sobbed, and fell off the bed onto the floor. Bewildered and terrified, Jaune knelt down with her.

"Pyrrha? Pyrrha, what is it?! Are you all right?!"

"Oh noooo... I'm... I'm..." She sobbed. "I'M A SLUT!"

Jaune blinked. Of all the things he had ever expected Pyrrha Nikos to say, that was... That wasn't in the top one hundred things he'd anticipate. Hell, it wasn't in the top thousand. It may as well not even be on the list!

"H-Huh?" Jaune managed, his jaw dropped. Pyrrha sniffled, and wiped her eyes. She looked up at him pleadingly.

"This... This isn't how I wanted it to go... B-But... You're a good man, Jaune. I-I know you are! You... You'd forgive the mother of your child for being... Being loose, r-right?!"

"My what?!" Jaune exclaimed, falling back in his crouch and slamming back into the bunk. Pyrrha continued to weep.

"I swear Jaune, I'll be the best wife you ever could ask for! I-I'll do anything you want! The-The most lewd, depraved things imaginable! I'll-I'll have twenty of your children if you wanted! I'll financially support us-!"

"WOAH WOAH WOAH!" Jaune cried, gettiing his rapidly stampeding thoughts all together into something approaching calm, before he grabbed her hands between his. He looked her in the eyes.

"Pyrrha?! What are you talking about?!" He demanded.

Pyrrha sniffled.

"I... I laid on a bed with a boy! That means... I'm pregnant now!"

Jaune blinked. He blinked again. He blinked a third time.

"I... Wha... You think... That's how it works?" He asked in utter disbelief.

Pyrrha sobbed again, and nodded.

"Isn't it?"

Jaune stared at her for a long time... Before he snickered.

"Hahaha! Oh, that's a great one, Pyr! I'm so glad you've loosened up enough to joke! Haaa... Wow, that is unconventional but... Y-yeah! You as a sheltered girl, not knowing... HAHAHAHA! Oh wow, you got me! That's hilarious!"

Pyrrha continued to sniffle, looking uncomprehendingly at Jaune. Jaune slowly stopped laughing.

"... You... You are joking... Right?"

Pyrrha huffed, and looked aside.

"I-I can't believe you're treating our child as a joking matter, Jaune!" Pyrrha sniffled again. "How could you?! What-What kind of a man are you? To-To just have a girl in your bed and then treat her like a joke!"

The door was opened. Ruby and Weiss entered, with Blake looking in curiously. Ruby looked concerned while Weiss frowned deeply.

"Is everything all right?" Ruby asked.

"What did you do, Arc?! You made Pyrrha cry!" Weiss growled.

Jaune opened his mouth but for once, Pyrrha interrupted him.

"I'm pregnant and he thinks it's a joke!"

"YOU'RE WHAT?!" Ruby and Weiss shrieked. Blake's jaw dropped as her hair bow perked right up.

Jaune slapped a hand over his face and sighed.

It's gonna be a long night...

- - -

Pyrrha Nikos was never taught about the birds and the bees thanks to her overprotective mother. Pyrrha had to piece things together, but between the cybernanny on her devices and how isolated she's been socially (as well as her private schooling), she has no idea about basic biology.

Poor Jaune.
Now,Jaune must take responsibility and marry her.There would be plenty of time to explain how babies come later.

So,Jaune should said that it is joke,becouse he would marry Pyrrha right now.Case solved.
The Arc Clan: Isabel's Siblings, the Vytal Festival and Cinder's Panic New
Cinder Fall was not prone to socializing a great deal. Her mission was to destroy all of Vale and these mewling brats were not really worth any more of her energy than necessary. That said, she did have to maintain her cover and Jaune Arc was friendly and stupid enough to interact with long enough to make her seem harmless. After all, if an idiot like him was at ease around her, she couldn't possibly be evil, right?

So when she saw him waiting outside the festival area proper all alone, she decided to interact a bit to reinforce her cover.

Cinder: "Hello Jaune."

Jaune: "Huh? Oh hey Cinder! It's nice to see you!" He smiles

Cinder: "Likewise. So, what are you doing here? Where's your team?"

Jaune: "Oh, they're just running a little late with RWBY. Something about a prank." He shrugged "But I'm also meeting my family here!"

Cinder: "Oh really?" A bunch of hick farmers no doubt...

Jaune: "Yup! My parents and my aunt and uncles! It's pretty rare for all of us to be in the same place at once, so it's great!"

Cinder: "I see... Well, I'll leave you to that-"

Father Alexander: "LADDIE!"

Jaune: grins "UNCLE ALEX!"

Cinder stares in utter disbelief as Father Alexander, one of the deadliest, most fearsome and PSYCHOTIC Paladins of the Church of the Broken Table's infamous Department XIII, pulls Jaune Arc into a tight hug with a happy laugh.

Alexander: "Hahaha! How are ye, laddie?"

Jaune: "Great, Uncle! How are you?"

Alexander: "Oh just fine, laddie! Took care of a little infestation out near Edge. Took care of the demons in the morning, and preached the rest of the day and night!"

Jaune: "Wow!"

Cinder: He calls clearing out two hundred Grimm Ursas and Beowulves a little infestation?!

Alexander: "Eh? Who's this lass?" Suspicious glare "Ye should cover up!"

Jaune: "Uncle! Come on! This is my friend Cinder Fall! She's from Haven!"

Cinder: "Yes, it's very nice to meet you, sir."

Alexander: glares "Hmph... Ye should have more practical clothing, lass! You young Huntresses thinkin' you just need to look good for the camera, invitin' lustful eyes..."

Jaune: "No no! She's not like that at all, Uncle! Really!"

Alexander: sighs "Ye got t' be careful, lad! No telling what's going on in some lass' heads over pure lads like you!"

Jaune: blush "UNCLE!"

Cinder: blush "I-I don't-I have no such intentions-Uh, maybe I should go-?"

Nanami: "Yo."

Jaune brightens as a tall, well built blond man in a smart tan business suit, blue undershirt, goggles, and leopard print tie walks up.

Jaune: "Uncle Nanami!"

The very stoic man smiles slightly and pats his nephew on the head.

Nanami: "It's good to see you well. You took my financial advice?"

Jaune: "Sure did! I've got plenty to finish Beacon and to upgrade my gear!"

Nanami: "Good. Keep an eye on those bonds, Vale's Council is bound to do something stupid again."

Alex: "Ha! All about numbers as usual, Nanami."

Nanami: adjusts his glasses "Shouldn't you appreciate them, Alex? Some think mathematics are the language of God."

Alex: "Yeah but yer focus has always been on the money side o' things."

Nanami: "You'll have to take that up with the Almighty, Alex. You any closer to talking to Him yet?"

Alex: "Closer than you!"

The brothers glare at eachother... Before Alex laughs and Nanami smirks a bit.

Alex: "Good to see ye."

Nanami: "Same."

Jaune: "Oh! Uncle Nanami, his is Cinder Fall, my friend!"

Nanami: nods "Good to meet you."

Cinder: "And-And you too... Um... I thought your last name was Kento?"

Nanami: shrugs "Kento was my mother's maiden name. I took it to draw less attention to my hometown."

Alex: "Ha! How much attention does a stockbroker get?"

Nanami: "More than I'd like."

Cinder's thoughts start to become frantic.

Cinder: Nanami the 7/3 Divider is this idiot's uncle?! One of the most infamous Grimm Hunters AND one of the best financial advisors in Atlas?!

He'd nearly made White Fang go bankrupt with his incredible power, tactics, and financial sense!

Nanami: "Anyway, where's Irina? She said she'd be here."

Alex: "You know her, always taking her time."

A beautiful blonde woman with large breasts and hips she somehow fit into a white business jacket and skirt strides up, smirking at them.

Irina: "Aw, why do my own brothers have to be so cold to me?"

Jaune: beams "Aunt Irina!"

Her cocky smirk becomes a warm, gentle smile for a moment as she accepts Jaune's hug. She then gets her cocky smirk back as she flicks Jaune's forehead.

Jaune: "Ow!"

Irina: "Heh. You're getting too tall for me to properly hug anymore!" She pouted "You should follow Tanya's example and stay short!"

Alex: "Best not tell her that, lass. Also, cover up damnit!"

Irina: snorts "We're not all prudes like you, Father Brother!"

Nanami: "It's more about how many men you attract, Irina."

Irina: smirks "And?"

Nanami: "We're trying to save them from you."

Irina: "I never heard any complaints~."

Alex: "'Cause ya killed them."

Irina: "Like I said, I never heard any complaints~."

Jaune: "Eh?"

Irina: laughs softly "Oh, we're just teasing, Jaune! You know me! I'm just a boring old teacher!"

Nanami: "With underaged students."

Irina: "I'm giving them something to look forward to!"

Irina locks her eyes on Cinder. She frowns.

Jaune: "Oh! This is Cinder Fall, my friend!"

Irina: "Oh? Nice to meet you. I'm Irina Arc."

Cinder: "N-Nice to meet you too..."

Irina's probing gaze seemed to go right through her. Which was understandable: Cinder had run into this woman before. She, Emerald and Mercury had barely escaped her... The White Bitch, one of the most infamous assassins in Remnant!

Mercury had wanted to do an assassination even she couldn't... Somehow managed to steal the kill... And the Bitch had nearly killed them all for it!

Irina: "You look rather familiar. Did we meet in Mistral, perhaps?"

Cinder: "M-Maybe! I'm from Haven, after all!"

Irina: "Hmmm..." Suspicious glare

Cinder: nervous smile

Sanji: "Hey. Hope I'm not too late!"

Cinder: Oh don't tell me...!


Jaune laughed and hugged a shorter, skinnier man in a black suit with a white undershirt and blue tie. His blonde hair covered one eye, while the other had a curly eyebrow over it. The man laughed and hugged his nephew while keeping a cigarette in his mouth.

Sanji: "Hey guys! Nanami, still a broody bastard?"

Nanami: "I don't know, still a man whore?"

Irina: smirks "Manwhore would imply he actually successfully made it with a woman once."

Alex: chuckles

Sanji: "Ugh, you gotta make me look bad in front of Jaune? You're worse than that damn swordsman!"

Alex: "Speaking of, where is yer crew anyway?"

Sanji: "Oh, they're coming for the Festival. They just gotta do it more carefully given we're, uh..."

Irina: deadpan "Pirates?"

Sanji: "Yeah! But the good kind!"

Nanami: sighs "If you get caught, make sure it's somewhere with no cameras?"

Sanji: "I'll do my best but you know Luffy. Not a subtle bone in his body." He looked over at Cinder "Oho? Who is this lovely mademoiselle~?"

Jaune: "Oh! This is Cinder Fall! She's-!"

Irina: deadpan "His friend, so knock it off."

Sanji: "Hey! I would never poach from family! Good on you, Jaune! I mean, you've got Pyrrha Nikos, that Yang girl, that Ruby girl-"

Jaune: "We're all friends! Friends!"

Sanji: smirks and winks "You got the good old Arc genes! You're gonna be a stud like me!"

Alexander: "Ha! Jaune's gonna be like his father, a good boy who marries a good woman and is fruitful and multiplies!"

Irina: "All things Sanji will never experience!"

Sanji: deadpan "Like you, huh?"

Irina: "I don't see the need to settle down right now! You're just terrible at attracting anyone!"

Sanji: "I am not!"

Irina: "Are too!"

The two growl at each other. Nanami sighs.

Nanami: "Sometimes I wonder how we survived childhood with them around."

Alexander: "Miracle of the Almighty, right there."

Cinder trembles. Jaune looks at her in concern.

Jaune: "You okay, Cinder?"


Sanji: "Oh! Hang on..." He prepares some tea and holds it out to her in a thermos "Ginseng infused tea. Calms the nerves."

Cinder gulps it down in desperation.

Irina: "Heh. Thirsty."

Nanami: "Basic joke."

Irina: "Like you?"

Cinder takes deep breaths as Jaune pats her on the shoulder.

Jaune: "You sure you're okay?"

Cinder: "Y-yes... Just fine... I-I'm just a little... Uh... Hot. It's so hot!"

Sanji: "May I provide an umbrella for the lady? Jaune asked me to bring one for his date."

Jaune: "No I didn't-" Sanji elbows him "Urk! I-I mean, sure!"

Cinder: Okay... Okay... So the idiot is related to some of the most dangerous people on the face of the planet! That's fine... That's fine...! So they're all coming for the festival! Big deal! I have an army of White Fang terrorists, Grimm, and that Grimm Dragon too! I bet the rest of his family is normal and not at all-

Isabel: "JAUNE!"

Jaune: gasps "Mom?!"

Isabel Arc storms up and hugs Jaune tightly, leaving a dust trail behind her from her haste.

Isabel: "Oh I'm so sorry, dear! I'm so sorry... I should have listened... My darling boy...!"

Nick: "HAHAHAHA! Let the boy down, Isabel! He's turning blue!"

Isabel sets him down, and flushes. She adjusts her glasses as Nick walks up alongside her. He smiles and pats Jaune on the shoulder.

Nick: "It's good to see you well, son."

Jaune: "Thanks Dad... Mom... I... I know you disapprove, but... But I have to follow my dreams."

Sanji: nods "A man has to follow his dreams."

Irina: "Or woman. It's just not something you can refuse."

Nanami: tiniest of smiles "Even if he goes off the path, he will find his way back."

Alexander: "Aye, if his faith and will are strong enough."

Isabel: sighs "I... I'm struggling with this, Jaune, but... I'll try to trust you. And believe in you."

Jaune: "Thanks Mom..."

Nick: "Ha! I knew you could do it the whole time, son."

Jaune: "Thanks Dad... Oh! This is Cinder Fall-"

Irina, Sanji, Nanami and Alexander: "His friend."

Isabel stares intensely at Cinder.

Isabel: "Oh?"

Cinder: "Y-y-yes... his friend..."

Cinder's self control is close to cracking.


Cinder: "In-In fact! We're the best of friends!"

Jaune: "Huh?"

Cinder grabs his hand and smiles as she trembles.

Cinder: "We're so close I-I'm totally his girlfriend! We're madly in love with eachother!"

Jaune: "Eh?!"

As Jaune's friends finally catch up... Cinder loses control completely.


Jaune: "EHHHHHH?!"

Weiss: "WHAT?!"

Yang: "WHAT?!"

Ruby: "WHAAAA?"

Blake: "Huh?!"

Nora: "WOW!"

Ren: "What."

Pyrrha: "What."

- - -
Bunch of hick farmers,indeed.I think,that bad Grimm dragon and White fang terrorists decided ,that they must be in other places....
Lisa Lavender the Reporter New
It's a shame more isn't done with Lisa Lavender. A cutthroat reporter out for views could be very entertaining as a story concept.

- - -

Jaune: "... Is that Lisa Lavender in a school uniform?"

Ren: "Looks like."

Jaune: "And... No one's stopping her?"

Lisa: "Hello, fellow students! Are you Jaune Arc and Lie Ren?"

Jaune: "... We are."

Lisa: "Can I have a moment of your time? Just to confirm some rumors?"

Jaune: "... We know it's you, Ms. Lavender."

Lisa: "Wha-But-My disguise is perfect!"

Jaune: "I mean it's very... Um... Sexy, but that's also the problem since you're clearly not a teenager."

Somewhere, Cinder sneezes.

Lisa: "Oh come on! Look... I need a case. A story. I'm desperate here! I'll even let you touch my boobs?"

Jaune: "N-No thanks! I mean, it's-Uh, No!"

Lisa: "Oh? Are you sure~?"

Jaune: "Ren?"

Ren has escaped

Jaune: "Traitor."

Lisa: "Sooo... You're the leader of Team JNPR, with Pyrrha Nikos on it. How is that going for you?"

Jaune: "Fine, thank you."

Lisa: "Are you and Pyrrha romantically involved?"

Jaune: "Wha-No! Of course not! We're just friends!"

Lisa: "Are you sure? She's definitely hugging on you a lot in some of these photos!"

Jaune: "She's holding me up after training!"

Lisa: "All right, what about you and local bad girl, Yang Xiao-Long?"

Jaune: "Also friends!"

Lisa: "Her little sister Ruby Rose?"

Jaune: "FRIENDS!"

After several minutes of this nonsense...

Lisa: "And your father and Isabel Arc?"

Jaune: "Happily married!"

Lisa: "Okay, that's all I need! Thanks Jaune!"

Jaune: "Phew... Finally. It's all over."

Later that night, as Jaune and his friends are relaxing in the common room, the news starts on the holoscreen.

Lisa: "Lisa Lavender of VNN! Our top story: Is Beacon Academy a hotspot of teenaged debauchery? Excerpts from a student reveal he is in a polyamorous relationship with his team, another team, and a boy on his own team!"

Jaune: "... Fuuuuuuuuuck!"

Users who are viewing this thread