ROB has decided to give you your very own planet, with a twist.

[Bassoe]

I believe I have found the most powergaming option meeting ROB's conditions, I'll take Borg Earth from the alternate timeline seen in First Contact and Engines of Destiny.

I started a co-op factory with a close friend. After a day of work, I stepped back, looked at what we built, and came to some realizations.

1) I have no ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ idea whats going on in this factory
2) Half the components that directly interact with each other aren't even near one another, one of the machines producing copper cable for another machine to assemble into circuit boards is halfway across the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ refinery
3) 90% of the conveyor belts are underground, and the rest are going so many directions this thing looks like a ball of yarn
4) There is coal ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ EVERYWHERE
5) I maintain enough sanity to count to 5
6) Staring at this thing makes my eyes itch
7) Looking away makes my brain itch

The scariest part is that it keeps getting bigger, and every time it gets bigger it somehow becomes MORE labrynthine. One of those ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ conveyor belts goes all the way around the entire factory to deliver steel plates to a single assembler thats making bloody gears, and its right next to the refinery itself!

Sometimes the factory breaks. We don't usually notice because of how much of a mess this thing is, and the breaks we do spot are often half an hour old and are a recurring problem. Rather than fix it, we simply unjam the machine and ignore it until it breaks again. The biggest problem to fixing it comes from our production lines. Normal production lines look like a grid. Ours looks like you threw a bunch of squares into a bowl of spaghetti noodles and gave the bowl to a five year old for a period of one to five minutes. This proccess results in either an empty bowl and a full five year old, a floor covered in noodles, or spaghetti all over the walls and ceiling with the squares nowhere to be found. Knowing the trend in increasing chaos and complexity the factory exhibits, probably all three.

The factory is an empodiment of madness incomprehensible even to the men who built it, laid every unholy circuit of conveyor belt, a thousand arms madly spinning every second, countless plates of copper and iron in a complex dance the likes of which is unseen in the realm of mere mortals. There are sections that I have no idea how they work, and I BUILT THEM.

The factory grows more complex with each passing second and more convoluted every milisecond. Perhaps the reason is in part due to each segment being constructed with no plans for future additions, then the future additions were constructed by forcibly adapting the existing segments, usually by shoving more tubes into it rather than actually redesigning it, and these futrue additions are also not planned for expansion. The end result is a cluster-♥♥♥♥ so large in magnitude, the last time a cluster-♥♥♥♥ rivaled it in size, God smote the town and turned its inhabitants into salt. Unfortunately no god can save us from this... thing.

Having expanded it further its almost as if the factory has a mind of its own, an ever hungry consciousness burning with dark malevolence and the need to grow. It infects all who stand in its presence, compelling them to add to it. A hundred furnaces belch smoke and the black blood of the earth is torn from its cradle to fuel the fires of industry. The ecosystem is demolished and the skin of the planet is rent and shattered for its glittering treasures, tossed into the inferno of a thousand stone and metal prisons to be transformed, used to expand the malignant blight upon the world that we brought. Ten thousand steel cogs turn and steam fills the air as the never ending fires boil the oceans away to power the sprawling spiderweb of mechanised mayhem, ordered chaos at its purest, a hundred thousand plates of steel and copper cycle and swirl in patterns barely knowable by the very people that created them.

Each day, the red and green fluids are pumped into glowing crystalline globes, each sparking and burning, discovering new knowledge and new machines. The factory grows. Each advance in technology only complicates matters. The factory grows. The new advances create a need for new resources. The factory grows. The new resources require new means of transportation. The factory grows. The new transportation feeds new machines that burn the new resources to produce blue fluids to discover new technology. The factory grows. The blue fluids feed the globes to reveal new truths, beginning the vicious cycle anew, a neverending circle of destruction and growth that will only end when every corner of the planet is scoured clean. The factory grows. The planet will never be scoured clean. The factory grows. The planet is infinite in size. The factory grows. The game will never be over.

The factory grows.

Epilogue:

//: Date: 6/21/[ERROR_NULL_VALUE]

Resources have dried up again. The factory consumes all within its reach, insatiable in its hunger. Though it had experienced full production stoppages in the past, the factory could never be eliminated from the planet by the natives, for the sun itself powered the beams of destruction that maintained its borders. Within the creaking, ancient cogs and permanent haze of foul and polluted smoke, a single humanoid shape slowly rises to its feet. Aged, failing flesh and bone long ago replaced with steel and chrome, once polished and clean, now weathered by uncountable years of exposure to acid rain and blackened by thick, choking smog, form its excuse for a body. It could have left while it was still human, before it was consumed in body by the foundry it created to escape. It never had a chance to leave, mind and soul devoured in the pursuit of freedom. With slow, clanking steps and the steady drip of oil from its joints, like a bleeding mechanical nightmare brought to hideous life, it stands and rasps as it moves for the exit. Behind it, a thousand drones rise like a plague of locusts, ready to continue the endless harvest. As the abomination that was once a man steps towards the gates of the factory, a mighty space faring vessel lies decrepit in its dry dock deep within the core of the facility. It was supposed to be a way off the planet, the whole reason for the factory's construction. But soon, the building of the factory became the means and the end, no thought other than the constant urge to grow in its mind.

The only machine resembling the human form in the entire world stepped out into the barren wasteland of the ruined world. A keening, howling wind tears across the surface, forests destroyed by the ruined atmosphere no longer keeping it in check.

It is the cry of a dead world, echoing forever on a planet overtaken by the machine.

 

[Agent23]

I believe I have found the most powergaming option meeting ROB's conditions, I'll take Borg Earth from the alternate timeline seen in First Contact and Engines of Destiny.

After reading this I am tempted to try and lawyer my own rules to get Timberborn earth and help my beaver civilization spread and take over the whole decimated Earth.

Then I shall take some of the giant sentient beavers to our earth and help them settle in Poland in secret.

Eventually they will blame them on Chernobyl or something.

 

[mrttao]

The planet must be one that has been under the control of, and still loyal to, an villainous fiction - GE, Chaos, the Borg, the Romulans, house Harkonen, etc.

hmmm...
Do you think Mars from WH40k counts as a villainous faction?
Become fabricator general, with all the boosties. and with all of mar's 40k tech.

actually.. not sufficiently advanced.
what about... supreme commander? yea, that is the right levels of clarketech.

 

[Jormungandr]

hmmm...
Do you think Mars from WH40k counts as a villainous faction?
Become fabricator general, with all the boosties. and with all of mar's 40k tech.

actually.. not sufficiently advanced.
what about... supreme commander? yea, that is the right levels of clarketech.

Total Annihilation. 'nuff said.

 

[mrttao]

Total Annihilation. 'nuff said.

Supreme commander is the sequel to total annihilation.
They are roughly the same, yea.

 

[Agent23]

hmmm...
Do you think Mars from WH40k counts as a villainous faction?
Become fabricator general, with all the boosties. and with all of mar's 40k tech.

actually.. not sufficiently advanced.
what about... supreme commander? yea, that is the right levels of clarketech.

Given that they have a literal Necron shard the Mechanics thinks is a god?

Bit of a stretch, I would personally grab Taa 2 or one of those other famous mechanicum planets that sided with Horus.

 

[Jormungandr]

Supreme commander is the sequel to total annihilation.
They are roughly the same, yea.

Spiritual sequel in the way 8 Bit Armies is to Command and Conquer, yes.

At their height, the Arm and Core were throwing planets at each other across the galaxy (TA: Battlegrounds lore).

Even Sup Com's Seraphim, the invasion of which basically rekt the Sup Com setting, would've been merely annoying bugs to the Arm and Core at their height.

 

[Agent23]

Spiritual sequel in the way 8 Bit Armies is to Command and Conquer, yes.

At their height, the Arm and Core were throwing planets at each other across the galaxy (TA: Battlegrounds lore).

Even Sup Com's Seraphim, the invasion of which basically rekt the Sup Com setting, would've been merely annoying bugs to the Arm and Core at their height.

It is a spiritual successor because the people at GPG, which made SupCom, were the same that made TA.

 

[King Arts]

hmmm...
Do you think Mars from WH40k counts as a villainous faction?
Become fabricator general, with all the boosties. and with all of mar's 40k tech.

actually.. not sufficiently advanced.
what about... supreme commander? yea, that is the right levels of clarketech.

I had this talk with agent he said the Imperium are the good guys so no. As for supreme commander he said the Aeon are the bad guys I kinda disagree but you know.

 

[Jormungandr]

It is a spiritual successor because the people at GPG, which made SupCom, were the same that made TA.

Yeah, but he said sequel, not spiritual sequel.

Yes, I'm being pedantic.

And, hilariously, all the stuff in Sup Com is drastically toned down from all the stuff in Total Annihilation -- Seriously, the Forever War and the Seraphim Invasion would've been a battlefront in Total Annihilation's main Arm versus Core war.

I do wish the Battlegrounds' lore was archived somewhere, though: All we have are memories at how insanely fun and batshit insane it was...

 

[mrttao]

Spiritual sequel in the way 8 Bit Armies is to Command and Conquer, yes.

At their height, the Arm and Core were throwing planets at each other across the galaxy (TA: Battlegrounds lore).

Even Sup Com's Seraphim, the invasion of which basically rekt the Sup Com setting, would've been merely annoying bugs to the Arm and Core at their height.

Oh, good to know. I guess I was somewhat misinformed.
Also, mislead by all those "ROB turned me into a supreme commander" fanfics where MC rapidly builds up into being a god.

 

[King Arts]

Oh, good to know. I guess I was somewhat misinformed.
Also, mislead by all those "ROB turned me into a supreme commander" fanfics where MC rapidly builds up into being a god.

I mean they aren’t completely wrong as the build times in supreme commander in game are cannon for the lore. So they can pump out tanks in seconds and build a base with nukes and defenses and an army in under an hour.

But a big problem with the nerds on cuckbattles is that they turn themselves into the giant robot when it’s supposed to be piloted. This is because the dickless wonders want to be overpowered with no danger to their self insert and are so pathetic they can’t even get a woman.

 

[Jormungandr]

Oh, good to know. I guess I was somewhat misinformed.
Also, mislead by all those "ROB turned me into a supreme commander" fanfics where MC rapidly builds up into being a god.

Sup Com is more popular because it's more recent, and a lot of people writing those fics were kids when they were playing it; conversely, TA was the true Old Skool of that subgenre, coming out in 1997.

Basically, they're used to having watered down Tabasco on their food, thinking it's the spiciest shit ever, because they've never eaten true hot sauce on their food (e.g. Reaper sauce).

Sup Com is the watered Tobasco, Total Annihilation is the shit you'd be sent to hospital from.

 

[King Arts]

hmmm...
Do you think Mars from WH40k counts as a villainous faction?
Become fabricator general, with all the boosties. and with all of mar's 40k tech.

actually.. not sufficiently advanced.
what about... supreme commander? yea, that is the right levels of clarketech.

Anyway why would you want to be Mechanicus. Sure some of their tech oooks nice but magos are ugly as hell being their leader wouldn’t be that fun.

Sup Com is more popular because it's more recent, and a lot of people writing those fics were kids when they were playing it; conversely, TA was the true Old Skool of that subgenre, coming out in 1997.

Basically, they're used to having watered down Tabasco on their food, thinking it's the spiciest shit ever, because they've never eaten true hot sauce on their food (e.g. Reaper sauce).

Sup Com is the watered Tobasco, Total Annihilation is the shit you'd be sent to hospital from.

To be fair supreme commander is a better game. The story is more fleshed out with actual characters and people and the graphics are better.

Though maybe a total anhilathion remake with modern graphics might be nice.

 

[mrttao]

Anyway why would you want to be Mechanicus. Sure some of their tech oooks nice but magos are ugly as hell being their leader wouldn’t be that fun.

I am looking to maximize my own personal gains. Both in augmentations, and what I can extract from the planet.

Mars in the specific has a bunch of crazy super tech locked in their vaults. which, due to religious reasons, they are not using. But which would be available to me.
It is the biggest industrial base humanity has in 40k and can and will produce cruisers.
And some magos are over 10k years old.

I am not saying I pick it, just considered it as a decent candidate.
Total annihilation/supreme commander are probably better choices.
(being superior in most things, but not all).

There are probably even better choices I am just not thinking about.

Also, something to consider is whether you can maintain your hold on the planet.
like... if I asked for apokalypse from DC, I would get overthrown in 10 minutes or so.

 

[King Arts]

I am looking to maximize my own personal gains. Both in augmentations, and what I can extract from the planet.

Mars in the specific has a bunch of crazy super tech locked in their vaults. which, due to religious reasons, they are not using. But which would be available to me.
It is the biggest industrial base humanity has in 40k and can and will produce cruisers.
And some magos are over 10k years old.

I am not saying I pick it, just considered it as a decent candidate.
Total annihilation/supreme commander are probably better choices.
(being superior in most things, but not all).

There are probably even better choices I am just not thinking about.

Also, something to consider is whether you can maintain your hold on the planet.
like... if I asked for apokalypse from DC, I would get overthrown in 10 minutes or so.

But don’t those gains beyond a certain point become useless? I mean you aren’t being sent to a dangerous place to fight aliens. You are being brought to our universe and we’ll pretty much anyone in sci fi who controls a whole planet would outclass us.

 

[mrttao]

But don’t those gains beyond a certain point become useless? I mean you aren’t being sent to a dangerous place to fight aliens. You are being brought to our universe and we’ll pretty much anyone in sci fi who controls a whole planet would outclass us.

The fact that ROB exists and is able to pull stuff from the multiverse into our world proves the universe is not as mundane as you believe

 

[Bassoe]

But don’t those gains beyond a certain point become useless? I mean you aren’t being sent to a dangerous place to fight aliens. You are being brought to our universe and we’ll pretty much anyone in sci fi who controls a whole planet would outclass us.

Our universe plus a bunch of suddenly empowered sietch posters.

 

[King Arts]

Our universe plus a bunch of suddenly empowered sietch posters.

Wow is it everyone getting a planet? I thought it would be only one of us.

 

[King Arts]

The fact that ROB exists and is able to pull stuff from the multiverse into our world proves the universe is not as mundane as you believe

True but still it would be nice to actually enjoy the perks of living as an absolute dictator. Being a robot means you can't really do that, that's why the Aeon Illuminate(even though they are really the good guys but @Agent23 disagrees) is a better choice they have a stronger industry and average tech plus psychic powers and you can still enjoy cute girls instead of losing your dick to be a toaster.


Though if @Bassoe is right and tons of other strangers are also getting planets I'll have to think about getting the most powerful group, then I'd ask @Agent23 if the Interim Coalition of Governance from the Xelee, count as bad guys.