War on the Horizon

ATP

Well-known member
Well,being evil do not mean,that you could be incopetent,too.
Unless you live in Draka universe,when you win by impaling nuns and raping enemy soldiers.
 
Chapter 49

MarkWarrior

Well-known member
Chapter 49

"You're staying here?" Siri asked as Paige walked off of the loading ramp of the Archon's Favor.

"Yes, ma'am," Paige waved some of Jenkin's men onto the ship. "Intel's landing in a little while and I want to make their job a bit easier."

"What do you mean?" Siri asked, a blond eyebrow raised as she considered that statement.

"We'll separate the prisoners and begin asking some pointed questions," Paige removed her helmet to move a hair that had come free from her bun, tucking it back into the rest. "Once we have more information from their computer systems we'll start cross verifying and checking their information."

"Ah," Siri sighed in relief. "I believed that you were going to torture them."

"Torture's an unreliable method of obtaining information," Paige said bluntly. "Sometimes chemical cocktails work, but finding exactly the right ones that work within a specific species or even person's body can be hard to dial in. It's easier to simply find a weak link and use basic psychology against them."

"I will remain behind," Siri held up a hand to stave off any arguments. "Not because I do not trust you. But because I may be able to assist. If I was angry at the treatment of the hostage, then I believe that you felt much the same."

"If you can play at being a lie detector it'll help," Paige agreed. "I take it you'll send the Apprentice with the wounded?"

"Yes, Ferus needs to be exposed to that sort of emotion otherwise it may take control of him," Siri sighed. "I know that I was once that young, but it feels like it was so long ago."

"Feel old later," Paige snorted. "We've got work to do."

The two women walked further into the compound, eventually seeing Colonel Hull speaking softly to Sienn Thompson.

"Make sure to get everything you can out of them," Hull eyed a small pool of blood from one of the dead terrorists for a second.. "I'm going to be heading back to Raxus with the hostages."

"And my Padawan will be accompanying you," Siri said as Paige and herself walked up. "I believe that the Archon's Favor will be leaving shortly."

"It is," Paige confirmed. "It's probably for the best that you get them back. Even if they are in terrible shape."

"Just so you're both aware," Hull sighed. "We're going to have some negative fallout because of this. Now, don't get me wrong, we're going to be applauded in public, but a lot of people will be asking pointed questions like 'Why did it take so long?' and 'Why didn't you prevent the injuries?." He seemed to age a few years as he spoke, a few wrinkles around his eyes looking deeper. "If any reporters try to ask questions simply refer them back to me or one of the PR people. I don't want anything coming back to bite any of y'all in the ass."

"I'll send out the memo," Paige responded. "But I'm not going to promise that my Marines won't say anything stupid."

"I'm not expecting perfection," Hull smiled. "Just that they don't get themselves into more trouble."







"Alright Rook," Sienn sat down next to the technician as he dove into the computer systems next to an older Togrutan. "What do you have for me?"

"A paper trail," the man smirked. "I've got information on funds and where they came from, I'll just have to trace them back."

"And that's where I come in," The Togruta began typing away at a datapad. "I'm a financial auditor and accountant, it's my job to look at these sorts of things and determine where they come from."

"Kurassh here is a bit of a special case," Rook shrugged. "He used to cook the books for a Hutt and when the Hutt got caught, they just locked 'em all up. He's technically serving out his term by assisting the CIS in a military capacity."

"I'm hoping to get out early on good behavior," Kurassh smiled. "I've seen the contracts you Marksman give out and I'd really like to sign on once I've finished my sentence."

"I'll leave you to it then," Sienn chuckled as the two dove back into the electronics.

"Any luck?" Siri asked as Sienn walked into one of the rooms that had been hastily repurposed into an interrogation room.

"We're slowly verifying our information," Sienn replied, her lekku twitching as she crossed her arms over her chest. "We'll have most of the real information extracted in a week or so. Which is a lot faster than it normally takes. Being able to tell whether someone was lying or not helped tremendously."

"A lie detector would have served much the same purpose," Siri waved the praise away.

"No, lie detectors can be more easily fooled," Sienn disagreed. "Now, once we finish up here we'll exfil and head on back to Beloria. Do you want to come with? Or are you planning on returning to Raxus?"

"That will be decided upon the information we receive," Siri stated. "Should it prove valuable enough, I believe that there will be much more for me to do."

"The reward for good work is more work," Sienn laughed. "I can't wait to take a vacation after this op. Alan won't be able to walk for weeks after I'm done with him."

"I don't need to hear more of this," Siri simply rolled her eyes at the Twi'lek. "You've regaled me with enough stories of your love life by now."

"I just figured I'd let you live vicariously through me," Sienn smirked. "After all, it's not like you're going to get to try all of the different things I can."

"Temple Jedi are not celibate," Siri deadpanned. "They just are not allowed to form attachments."

"You mean that there's a lot of raunchy one night stands then," Sienn grinned wide. "Do tell."







Date: July 15, 3015/15.07.7954 CRC
Location: Raxus Secondus, Raxus System, Aubek sector, Confederacy of Independent Systems

"Colonel Hull, you were said to have information for us," Vinon Korra leaned forward in her chair, the other members of the Security Council doing the same.

"Yes, Minister Korra," Colonel Hull's barren uniform matched the atmosphere of the room. "After we recovered the hostages and brought them back-"

"Not without harm," someone muttered.

"We began running dedicated slicing attempts and interrogating what prisoners we were able to take, eventually culminating in a series of funding transactions that we traced back several steps," a hologram appeared showing the names of various banking and investment firms in the galaxy. "Thankfully, we were able to utilize some of the Confederacies own people for this part of the investigation, and one of your accountants was able to trace the root of the funds all the way back to someone on Coruscant."

The Hologram shifted to show the large figure of Orn Free Taa.

"This is the person responsible for the attacks on the representatives from Ryloth," the Colonel stated, his voice almost soft. "I leave it to this August body to decide what is to be done about this."

"You may be dismissed, Colonel," the minister nodded in thanks. "Please wait outside for us to discuss what is to be done."

"So, it is as we feared," an old man sighed in his chair. "This is only the beginning of the problems we will have with the Republic at our doorstep."
"We must bring Orn Free Taa to trial," someone agreed. "But we must do it in such a way that shows the Republic that we are not to be trifled with."

"We need someone who may have a foothold on Coruscant to allow us access," Korra thought out loud. "Someone who can represent our interests and defend themselves if it comes to poison or an assassin's blade."

"If I may," the young politician who had muttered earlier made himself known. "The Republic Senate has already summoned the Count's pet Colonel," the man sneered. "Why not order him to make himself known. After all, even if he is slain, it is not something we should be all that concerned with. He is a Mercenary, and there will be others to take his place."

"The idea is not all bad," a Quarren shrugged. "While I may disagree with the Representative from Raxus Prime, he raises a fine point. Colonel Hull does have a way to speak to the Senate and request for this criminal to be handed over for Justice's sake."

"From his recent engagements with the Lok Revenants, he has even made contact with the Senator from Naboo," the old man pointed out. "I do believe that we should make a request that he be escorted by Temple Jedi as well as our own, that there will be no doubt he is there to represent our interests and those of the people of the Confederacy. We may be young, but we will not cower away in fear."

"We will draft this plan and bring it before the Representative Body," Minister Korra sighed as she called in a few aids. "Let's begin, I believe that we would all like to break for dinner as soon as possible."

"As if," the younger man scoffed. "I can do this all day."

"How rude," a cane slammed down into the table beside the man, the older man from the Regency Worlds standing firm. "It would serve you well to learn manners young man, acting in such a fashion will make you many enemies, and none here will defend you should it end in blood."

"Then you are no better than the Republic," the young man spat.

"Should you desire it, I will gladly duel you over whether I am right nor not at a later time," Cassius glared. "You serve at the behest of your people, do not forget that."

"Mister Clay, if you will please allow me," Minister Korra smiled at the old Abolitionist. "I'll handle this."

"Representative Cerhine, should you act out like that again, I will have you removed from this council. I do not care who your backers are among the Representative Body. We were appointed here to serve the interests of the Confederacy and the worlds which it represents. We are to consider defense and security. That is our mandate, and I aim to keep this nation alive as long as I draw breath. So if you want to go stir up trouble, the Core is that way," Korra pointed in the general direction of Coruscant. "We're from the Mid and Outer Rims, we don't have time for that sort of Poodoo here."

"Very well," Cerhine stood up, his fancy clothing shining in the light. "I see where I am not desired."

"Damned fool," Cassius scoffed. "Let's get this plan drawn up, I've got a speech to make in an hour."

"Alright," Korra slapped her hands down on the surface of the table. "Let's do this."
 

ATP

Well-known member
Siri - one night stand could lead to good Marine attachment.
And Cerhine is either fool,or plant - if second is true,then he is probably working for somebody who work for Palpy.
 
Chapter 50

MarkWarrior

Well-known member
Chapter 50

"Which ships are you taking for escort?" Sheppard asked Hull as he threw some clothing and weapons into a duffle bag.

"I'm leaving the Leviathan with y'all," Hull checked the chamber on an ancient looking handgun before sliding it into a holster underneath his duster. "I want to make an impression though."

"So you're bringing the Katana," Sheppard grinned. "You just live to piss off the politicians, don't you?"

"What gives you that idea?" Hull grinned as he tucked a few extra magazines into some concealed pouches and allowed the duster to cover them.

"The fact that you're planning on smuggling weapons onto the Senate floor," Sheppard began counting off of his fingers. "Showing up in the flagship of their old fleet, you had a representative frozen in carbonite-"

"That one was completely justified," Hull glanced up. "He's a menace, and there was no way I was allowing him to wander the Leviathan while we were still in a combat zone."

"You still did it though," Sheppard pointed out. "Even if you did make it look like he stumbled into it by accident."

"We're moving on from the subject," Hull straightened up and slung the duffle bag over his shoulder. "You've got the notes for the expansion and the promotions."

"Yeah," Sheppard nodded. "I do."

"Then enjoy yourself, Lieutenant Colonel," Hull saluted.

"Great," Sheppard groaned. "Lemme guess, more paperwork?"

"Always," Hull chuckled. "Anyway, you have full authority to negotiate more contracts while I'm gone."

"And if you end up in a Republican prison somewhere?" the XO asked.

"Then I fully expect a professionally done jailbreak," Hull retorted. "I don't expect to be arrested, but I'm going to make some contingencies if it happens. And the Count is helping with some of that planning."

"Godspeed, Hull," Jack brought his friend in for a hug before patting him on the back and nodding. "Show 'em how a true Marksman does it."







"So, it seems you're just always assigned to me," I glanced at Siri as she stepped up on my right flank.

"It's better to have someone familiar with you and how you work," Siri shrugged. "That, and it's never a dull moment around you."

"Colonel," A man in the Marksman's gold and black uniform saluted. "Lieutenant Kit Sturn, I'm the one who's been put in charge of your bodyguard detail."

"Lieutenant," I returned the salute. "I don't think we've met before."

"No, sir, we haven't," Kit moved to the opposite side. "I joined up a while ago, been working my way up the ranks ever since."

"Well, we're glad to have you," I smiled. "You got any family, Lieutenant?"

"Yessir," Kit reached into his pocket and pulled out a holographic frame, five young faces appearing and a gorgeous woman smiling at the camera. "Got five kids, and might have a few more on the way soon."

"That's awesome!" I grinned. "I love large families. Lieutenant, if you need anything to help take care of them you just let me know. I'm all for helping out the large families. Now, tell me a bit about them."

"Well, my oldest is Xan," Kit smiled as he pointed at the girl who was starting to enter puberty. "She's a fiery little Mandalorian, just like her mother, Sara. I think she's on the ASF track right out of school. She wants to be a pilot, and really likes those ones that you guys developed and improved on."

"The modified Aethersprites?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah," Kit rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. "I may have let her pilot the family freighter a time too many when she was growing up."

"Well, we did make them safer than they originally were," I pointed out. "Doctor Rogers is a very talented engineer."

"Yeah," Kit shrugged. "I just don't know where I went wrong. I tried to teach her to be a good groundpounder but it didn't seem to take."

"I'm sure one of them'll take after you," I replied.

"Ullal wants to become a 'mech pilot," Kit continued. "He's not old enough to do anything more than play with those small sims that you guys put in the schools, but he loves the war droids. He thinks they're right out of the old stories."

"Old stories?" Siri spoke up.

"Long time ago," he waved a hand to indicate it was a very old story. "Old Republic era, the Mandalorians had Basilisk War Droids, rode them down from orbit in attacks. There are poems and songs written about it and we've passed them on down."

"Well, while orbital insertion is an option," I snarked. "We'd rather not put that sort of wear and tear on our units unless it's required."

"Believe me," Kit shuddered. "Once I got into O-School they showed us the stats on different battles and the casualty rates. I'd rather not do a contested orbital insertion if I can help it."

"Well, Lieutenant," I paused as we reached my quarters. "It was a pleasure meeting you, I believe that I'm in good hands. Get some rest and call your family. They'll want to spend some time talking to their dad."

"Yessir!" The man saluted before heading off to his own quarters, leaving me alone with Siri Tachi.

"A very interesting man," Siri said as she took a seat at the small table in the quarters I had been assigned. "Why the focus on such large families though?"

"I'm the oldest of fourteen," I sat on the bunk bed as I cast my mind back quite a few years. "And I used to have a handful of kids of my own. If I hadn't been separated from them I'd probably have had six to eight kids myself. But it seems that there were other things in store for me."

"Fourteen," Siri smirked. "That is nearly the size of one of your squads is it not?"

"I didn't come up with the fifteen man squad," I chuckled as I realized what she meant. "But I can see how it looks that way."

"I do not mean to pry," Siri finally said after some thought. "But what happened to your family? It seems that most of your group brought their families with them. I've met Peterson's wife, and many of the others had their families. But you, you alone do not seem to have anyone like that."


"Well," I stroked my beard. "It's a bit of a long story."

"We have time," Siri replied. "It will take at least a week to arrive at Coruscant, if not longer."


"So, it all started about fifteen or so years ago," I began. "When I woke up on a derelict called the Manassas."
 
Marksman Dress Uniform

MarkWarrior

Well-known member
IMG_5136.webp


The Dress uniform for the Marksman (Or as close as I could get AI to draw it).

Replace the buttons with places for ribbons/medals and a nametag and you're pretty close. Hat is more of a matte black with gold trim, but that's fairly accurate as well. Spurs are for ASF, Mechwarriors, and any Armored Cav units. Everyone else gets nice boots and an insignia indicating which section they work in.
 

AmosTrask

Well-known member
IMG_5136.webp


The Dress uniform for the Marksman (Or as close as I could get AI to draw it).

Replace the buttons with places for ribbons/medals and a nametag and you're pretty close. Hat is more of a matte black with gold trim, but that's fairly accurate as well. Spurs are for ASF, Mechwarriors, and any Armored Cav units. Everyone else gets nice boots and an insignia indicating which section they work in.
That's very similar to late 1800 US Army cavalry parade uniforms. I have to ask why you chose a 10 gallon hat though? Isn't Hull in his 90s by now? What is the life span of Battletech humans?
 

ATP

Well-known member
Kit telling about his kids? if it was old movie,he would die saving Hull,who would promise to take care about his kids.
But here? he could die or not,and not on Corusant anyway.

P.S Hull do not have waifu,Siri is single...author ,do something !
 
Chapter 51

MarkWarrior

Well-known member
Chapter 51
Date: August 30, 3015/30.08.7954 CRC
Location: MMS (Marksman Mercenary Ship) Katana, en route to Coruscant…

"Representative Clay," I nodded at the man who had been selected to come and assist in the negotiations with the Republic. "It's a pleasure."

"Always," he grinned as he settled down into a chair. "Now, we need to discuss the main talking points and get things agreed upon before we enter that snake pit."

"I was planning on being straightforward," I shrugged. "The CIS is a sovereign and independent state similar to the Hapans, we should be treated with the same dignity and respect."

"Aye," Cassius leaned back in his chair. "We should, but they won't acknowledge that. We're going to have to fight them every step of the way. So, I'm going to warn you in advance," he smirked. "I don't accept compromises, so I expect we'll have quite a few death threats and potential assassinations coming our way."

"And we want Senator-in-Exile Taa admitted to our court systems," I nodded. "I have a feeling that they're not going to want to do that."

"No, they will not," Clay replied. "They do not see our government as legitimate. And until we have established that we are both sovereign and not in rebellion we will continue to face this issue."

"So," I interlaced my fingers, propped my elbows up on my desk, and leaned forward. "Where do we begin to do that?"

"We begin, with the allies that you have already made," Cassius smiled. "You are well known in the Seswenna sector, and despite the fact that you are a member of the CIS, many of the senators that fall in line and support Eriadu will likely be in support of this. And let us not forget that Rendili will be likely to support the CIS as well."

"So, we have the beginnings of support, now we need to figure out how to leverage that," I hummed.

"Indeed," Clay paused in thought. "While also remembering that to compromise is to lose."

"Right," I sighed as I racked my brain for ideas. "We have a week to get our shit together, so I guess it's time to dive into the politics."

"I'm afraid so," Clay relaxed. "Just remember to write things down, I might be a bit forgetful in my old age now."







"Captain," I stepped onto the bridge of the Katana. "I believe you asked for me?"

"Yessir," the captain shifted in his chair. "We have a ship asking to dock with us and speak to you."

"Oh?" I raised an eyebrow.

"A Senator Padme Amidala and her escorts are requesting permission to dock and come aboard," he explained. "How would you like us to proceed?"

"Let her board," Cassius made his presence known. "I would like to meet one of those who would be our opponents."

"I just hope she's been struck by a bout of common sense," I sighed. "Captain, give them the go ahead. Lieutenant," I turned to look at Sturn. "If she's accompanied by a Gungan named Binks, then there's a standard protocol that's been created for such a situation. Follow it to the letter. Do not deviate or we will all regret it."

"Heh, I'm sure he's not that bad, boss," Kit tried to laugh my concern off before he was halted in his tracks and turned to face me, my hands on his shoulders, the smile falling off of his lips as he met my gaze. "Follow the protocol to the letter, got it."

"I've heard the stories about Binks," Siri agreed. "Kenobi had quite a bit to say."

"And I'd prefer to avoid adding to said horror stories," I allowed Lieutenant Sturn to continue on towards the bays. "Once you collect the Senator, please escort her to the office that Representative Clay and I have been using."

"Yes, sir!" Kit continued on his way.




"Senator Amidala?" Kit asked as a small group walked down the ramp of the silver ship.

"Yes," a petite brunette inclined her head. "Are you my escort?"

"Yes, ma'am, I'm Lieutenant Sturn" the Mandalorian nodded in greeting as he introduced himself.. "I'm also supposed to ask if you have Representative Binks with you."

"No," Padme tried to cover and conceal her laughter behind her hand before giving up and failing. "No, I believe he is still on Coruscant."

"Oh, good," Sturn waved at the group of men that had been intended for implementing Protocol 11. "Then your people can retire to a nearby mess hall while I take you and your chosen escort to Representative Clay and Colonel Hull."

"Captain Typho," Amidala looked back at the captain of her guard, allowing him to make the choice.

"Senator," Typho inclined his head as he moved to flank the woman.

"After you, Lieutenant."







"Ahh, Master Yoda," Chancellor Palpatine smiled gently at the diminutive Jedi Master. "It's a pleasure to see you and Master Windu grace my office with your presence again."

"The Senate is asking us to provide escorts for the delegation from the Confederacy of Independent Systems," Windu took a seat as was indicated. "But while we maintain a positive relationship with the Head of State of the Confederacy, we are not willing to break any appearance of neutrality between our Order and the Confederacy. Many of our Knights are in the Outer Rim after all, and their travel being impeded could mean life or death for many sentients."

"Requested the Senate has, responded, have we," Yoda finally spoke. "Take sides in a potential conflict, we will not."

"But of course," Palpatine replied. "I would not expect anything else from your honored Order. After all, I have the utmost respect for the services you provide to the Republic. However, I do hope that you will be present for the negotiations. Especially considering how precarious these negotiations may be."

"Attend the proceedings, we shall," Yoda nodded. "Be absent, the Order will not."

After discussing a few missions that several Jedi had been dispatched on and inquired as to the status of Anakin, Palpatine dismissed the leaders of the Jedi Order, a sinister smile creeping across his face as the door slid shut.

Standing up from this chair and looking out the transparisteel of the window, he contemplated his next move before nodding to himself. Yes, it was time to begin casting suspicion on the Order. And the best way to do that was to allow some of those whom he had twisted in the last year to make an appearance. After all, a disposable weapon that was pointed in the right direction would cut all that lay in its path, heedless of those that it would harm. Oh, the damage that would be wreaked on the reputation of the Order. It would be Glorious! All that was left, was to orchestrate the timing.
 

ATP

Well-known member
random corrupted Jedi: i did everything what you ordered,master!
Palpy: kill him!
rcj: why? you say you lov...arrghhh

Unhappy End.
 
Chapter 52

MarkWarrior

Well-known member
Chapter 52


"Senator Amidala," Colonel Hull stood and greeted the woman, helping her into a chair as he moved to the other side of a small table. "This is Representative Clay, he'll be representing the Confederacy of Independent Systems in the talks with the Republic."

"Senator Amidala," the older man stood and kissed her hand. "It's a pleasure."

"Colonel Hull, Representative Clay," Padme acknowledged the two men. "I had originally only thought to meet with Colonel Hull, here. When we last met, you said something in a language I had never head before, and my protocol droid was unable to translate it with any true success."

"Oh," Hull raised an eyebrow. "You'll have to refresh my memory a bit, I've had quite a few important meetings happen since then."

"You said Si vis Pacem, Para Bellum," Padme replied. "You also told me to find time to meet with you if I wanted to discuss more of this. So," she spread out her hands. "Here I am. Now, explain please."

"The words you were unable to recognize are from a dead language from my homeworld," Hull finally said after a moment. "In Basic, they would most closely translate to. "If you want peace, prepare for war."

"That ties in heavily with what I have been studying as of late," the brunette finally said after a moment of thought. "Colonel, Representative, tell me. Do you desire a war with the Republic?"

"God no!" Hull shook his head. "I've got enough work with pirates and other scum that I don't need a war to feed my people."

"The CIS would like to be at peace with everyone," Cassius stated firmly. "I however, am personally pushing for a war with the Hutts. Slavery is a bane everywhere among the galaxy, and I would have us firmly stand against that evil no matter where it attempts to lie hidden."

"Then why secede?" Amidala asked. Why not try to change the system?"

"Do you think we were idle?" Cassius sighed. "No, we attempted every legal means that were available to us to change the system. And some of us attempted illegal means to do so. But it was not enough. The Republic is bloated, and many of them refused to listen or even move to assist us when we were dealing with pirates. If they would not move to help Eriadu, one of the staunchest supporters of the Republic among the Outer Rim, then why would they listen to the likes of my homeworld?"

"I see," Padme sighed and seemed to deflate a touch as she considered Clay's words. "What are your intentions for the negotiations. If they are not unreasonable, then I will do what I can to support you."

"It's simple," Clay met the Senator's eyes. "We want the Confederacy recognized as an independent and sovereign nation. And we want Orn Free Taa handed over to our courts so that justice may be rendered."

"And what will this justice consist of?" Padme crossed her arms over her chest. "I will not agree unless it can be made plain that he will be given a fair and just trial."

"There will be one judge," Clay stated. "He will be able to find an attorney, or one will be provided by the CIS. Regardless, it will work much the same as the courts in the Republic. Only we have some more strict penalties for the crimes that he was engaged in."

"Then you have my support," she replied. "Now, onto some questions I had for the colonel regarding the formation of a military for a planetary defense force."

Cassius leaned back and simply listened as the next generation began to discuss what the future held, and smiled as he closed his eyes. Regardless of which side was chosen, the future was in good hands.






September 2, 3015/ 02.09.1954 CRC

Senate Building, Coruscant, Corusca Sector, Galactic Republic

"How long does this drag on for?" Hull leaned forward, a pained expression on his face. "I've been sitting in this chair for hours, and it's really uncomfortable."

"Would you rather be standing?" Sienn asked from her chair, the gown she had chosen flattering her figure but not revealing the sheer amount of concealed weapons she carried.

"Honestly?" the Colonel sighed. "Yes. I'd rather stand in the sun or fight on the battlefield than be here."

"Patience," Siri cautioned. "The Senate often deliberates on subjects such as this for hours on end. We may not even get an audience for another day or so."

"Unacceptable," Clay shook his head. "We are not some backwater cluster of planets that can be dismissed so easily," the old man typed a message into the pad in front of him, and two different heads met his eye as he gave them a sharp nod. "Now, we shall see how they handle this."


"The Senator from Naboo motions to allow the Representative from the Confederacy of Independent Systems a chance to speak," Mas Amedda announced.

"Corellia seconds the motion," Senator Garm Bel Iblis glanced at Clay. "They have made an effort to attend, they should be allowed to speak."

"Eriadu agrees in full," The entire floor seemed shaken as Senator Gideon Tarkin from Eriadu stood tall in his military-esque uniform. "The Confederacy are made up of systems that are our brothers and sisters among the Mid and Outer Rim. They were within their rights to choose a differing form of government. If they should desire it, then we should treat with them. Let us not find ourselves lacking in Governance or in compassion in regards to other nations."

"The motion carries," Amedda spoke. "The Chair recognizes the Honorable Cassius Marcellus Clay and Colonel Mark Hull as the representatives of the Confederacy of Independent Systems."

"Good afternoon," Clay gave a small bow as the pedestal moved out to the middle of the senate floor. "I am, as the Chair said earlier, a representative for the Confederacy of Independent Systems. And I stand before you, God, and those who we represent to demand one thing."

"And what might that be?" another senator scoffed. "It's not as if we've done anything that could possible harm you?"

For once, the senate floor was silent as each of the pedestals chirped with the receipt of a message, and it was clear where the message was from as the silence was broken.

"Justice," Clay said softly. "Justice for those who were harmed by the one who was supposed to serve those who he represented. Justice for those who were sold like cattle into slavery because of the policies that were applauded and put into place. Justice, for those who were recently captured as hostages, simply because they wished to find a better way of life. Justice, for those who Colonel Hull rescued that had been raped, tortured, and God alone knows what else.

I say to those of you who have any sense of morals and ethics left in your veins. See to it, that good is done today, that the wrongs are righted. Orn Free Taa has done something reprehensible, and we, as law-abiding citizens of any nation, cannot abide by such a thing being done. Whether it is within, or without our borders."

"And what would you do with him, were he to be admitted into your care?" Senator Mon Mothma asked. "Would you simply allow your citizens to do as they desired? Would you let him be tortured or for any other means of cruelty to come to him?"

"What manner of beings do you believe us to be?!" Clay recoiled as Hull put his hand on the representatives shoulder as he stood up.

"Senator Mothma from Chandrilla, was it?" Hull asked.

"Yes," the woman nodded.

"Are you aware of my chosen profession?"

"I know that you have chosen war to be your profession," she replied. "What has that to do with justice?"

"That, is where you are sadly mistaken," Hull allowed his hands to rest calmly at his belt. "I am a mercenary, not merely a soldier who is told to go and fight for a his nation in a foreign land. What that means is that my word and promise are unbreakable bonds, that whatever contract I sign I am not only responsible for holding to the letter of, but to the spirit of also. Without such trust, I have no work, and I become a step closer to a common bandit as I drift about looking for a way to feed those in my care. If you cannot trust anything else, you can trust that I will personally see to it that Orn Free Taa is kept safe until his trial. And, should he be sentenced, I will also ensure that he is alive to see his sentence carried out. Anything after that, will be beyond my concern."

After that statement, the Senate dissolved into chaos as it usually was, with the various power blocs arguing over what was to be done while Amedda uselessly called for order while the CIS's pedestal drifted back into place and locked itself down.

"And now we wait for the storm to settle," Siri leaned back. "After this, we shall see where we have to apply pressure in order to get the cracks to spread."

"It's just like being on another op," Hull sighed, his duster falling back as he stretched. "Which means that something's about to start shooting at us, mark my words."


Author's Note: I had this written earlier this week. I figure Christmas Eve makes a decent Christmas present for y'all. 😝 have a Merry Christmas and a happy new year, all!
 

ATP

Well-known member
Well,i bet that Paplpy would find a way to start short,victorious war.
And Merry Christmas!
 
Chapter 53

MarkWarrior

Well-known member
Chapter 53​
Unknown date and location…
"Your existence is pain." The voice of his captor whispered into his ear as he raged against his bonds reaching for a connection that slipped away again and again. The force had abandoned him long ago, and all that was left where light and life had once been was a burnt-out husk.

Then, as if a switch had been switched, the pain stopped for a brief moment, and the fog of red that had long ago descended over his eyes lifted enough for him to see his tormentor and the room that he was in.

Duracrete walls and barren floors surrounded him. The only thing preventing him from leaving his tenuous connection to the force and his inability to move a single muscle with the electric current still spreading through his muscles.

"Would you like for this to end?" The cloaked figure asked quietly.

The man tried to speak, but his voice broke as he opened his mouth.

"Of course," the cloaked figure spread his arms out grandly. "Where are my manners?"

A droid brought a small plastoid water bottle and straw over, allowing the tortured to whet his throat.

"I'll do anything," he croaked. "If it is within my feeble power, then I will see to it that what you desire is done."

"Good, good," a hand was raised, the Force breaking loose the shackles as the tortured was picked up by a droid. "See to his injuries, and inform me of when he is capable of doing what I desire."

The cloaked figure walked out as the droid carried him to a nearby medical bed. Then, the droid wheeled him into a room where a Bacta tank and other medical equipment were waiting to be used.

"Be still," a medical droid's baritone instructed. "You require fluids and other procedures to restore your muscles to proper functionality."

The droid injected the man with a sedative and began the grisly work of restoring the tortured to some form of health.






September 2, 3015/ 02.09.1954 CRC

Senate Building, Coruscant, Corusca Sector, Galactic Republic

"Well, it seems that a decision will not be coming from the Senate today," Clay sighed as we left the pedestal. "Thankfully, I managed to arrange for us to get lodging close to the Hapan Embassy."

"And that's important, because?" I raised an eyebrow, the name hitting a few notes of memory, but not enough to ring any big bells.

"Because they're one of the few interstellar nations that are not a part of the Republic. And we've yet to work out any agreements with them," Cassius turned a bit red. "And they are home to some of the most beautiful women in the galaxy. You'll not find many like them."

"He's not wrong, Colonel," Lieutenant Sturn agreed. "If I hadn't settled down with Sara I'd have been willing to travel to find someone from that region. They make for damned fine Mandalorians."

"I'll look into opening some recruitment there," I stroked my beard, humming as we moved through the wide yet crowded corridors that surrounded the big open space of the Senate 'Floor'.

"Wait here," our second Marksman bodyguard went through the outer door to check our speeder, the team on the other side being the rest of the squad.

The large speeder was checked over by a trio of Marksmen, each one checking a subsystem while a bomb tech checked for any potential explosives.

"We're clear," Sturn opened the door and waited for us to move through. "We've got some ASF on standby to provide escort."

"How did we get permission for that?" Siri asked. "Coruscant traffic control must have fought you on every level for that."

"We didn't ask," Sturn replied. "Our charges are more important than their traffic rules."

We climbed into the armored speeder and entered the traffic of Coruscant, a quartet of our variant of the Aethersprite fighter falling into formation around us as we sped off toward the rooms that Cassius had managed to get for us.







"This is a nice place," I looked around at tasteful and solid-looking furniture, everything seemed humble until I took a closer look and saw that master craftsmen had touched each and every single piece. "Well made, but humble."

"This place isn't as well renowned and in the view of citizens like the 500 Republica," Cassius sat in a comfortable-looking chair. "And their privacy is better by far."

"Isn't there supposed to be more traffic outside?" Sienn asked as she peered out of the transparisteel window.


"Yes, there is," Clay poured himself a decanter of some sort of liquor and took a sip, savoring it before leaning on his cane and standing up, his coat vanishing to reveal a pair of holstered blasters. "Lieutenant, we are likely to receive some unwelcome guests shortly. You may wish to contact the Katana and see if we can acquire reinforcements. Assassins are sometimes subtle here on Coruscant, but we are foreigners, and many will gladly cover up our deaths."

"Siri," I said calmly as I slid my duster back and brought up my sidearm, the positively ancient weapon of polymer and metal sitting comfortably in my hand as if it were an old friend. "Remember the Leviathan?"

"Yes," she used the Force to bring her lightsaber to her hand. "What about it?"

"I'm pretty sure that we've got a similar problem on our hands," I checked the chamber on my 9mm and reholstered it before accepting a laser carbine that Sturn handed me. "Please tell me we've got something ballistic," I passed him the laser carbine back. "I'm partial to things that go boom."

We ensured that all of us were armed appropriately, and then we waited. Time seemed to slow to a crawl as the first five minutes passed, then fifteen, and just as some of us started to relax, a red glow lit the other side of a door.

The red lightsaber burned slowly through the reinforced door, the acrid smoke and smell of molten metal stinging our noses.

"This is Bravo-One, we're beginning to rappel down now, ETA two mikes," the calm voice of Mathis announced as the blade began to circle back around to complete the cut.

"I fuckin' knew the other shoe was about to drop," I sighed as I checked the chamber on the rifle I'd swapped the laser carbine for. "Remember people, if it's a Jedi then you make absolutely certain ballistics go first. Molten metal moving at the speed of sound is just as lethal as the solid projectile."

Then, the blade shut off, or withdrew, I wasn't exactly sure which as the cutout was shoved through the hole by an invisible force and ejected out the window, striking a speeder on the way down as the entrance began to be filled with smoke.

And as if mirroring an event far into the future of this universe, A red blade was the only thing shining from the other side as it moved through.
 

ATP

Well-known member
So,Palpy send assasin,which is tortured Jedi.I hope,that they manage to take him alive,so it would be clear that was not Jedi work.
And Hull is right about guns being better against Jedi.
 
Chapter 54

MarkWarrior

Well-known member
Chapter 54​

I let out a breath that I had been holding as I squeezed the trigger of my rifle, the harsh "Crack!" of the supersonic bullet extra loud indoors as a figure made its way out of the smoke, an armored droid pockmarked with holes stood with a lightsaber in hand before it was headcapped by a laser from Sienn, her laser carbine smoking as an eerie silence filled the air before more droids started flooding into the room.

I engaged the droids as they entered the room, my rifle rounds knocking them back as the blaster and laser fire from the other Marksmen erased what was left. "They're flooding the room with numbers!" Lieutenant Sturm barked. "These are IG models, tough as nails and hard to put down."

"What weaknesses do they have?" I asked, reloading as my magazine ran dry.

"Sustained fire," Sturn replied as he ducked back into cover as a blaster bolt nearly sheered his head in half. "Or the lasers seem to be making short work of them."

"You heard the man!" I yelled. "Marksmen, tag team, I want this sorted!"

We rapidly picked up on a method, with the ballistics hitting first and knocking the droids back before a blaster or a laser finished the droid off. But then another smoke grenade was hurtled in, and we were blind aside from the flickering of enemy blasters cutting through to kill us.

"These guys are smart," Sienn got close to my ear. "They're gonna wait for us to run out of ammo. They likely have more- A red lightsaber carved the cover that Sienn and I were using as cover in half, a masked and cloaked figure growled angrily and snapped his hand out, throwing the Twi'lek spy across the room with the force while I grabbed at the lightsaber on my belt, snapping it up and igniting the violet blade as the angry red blade of the Dark Jedi carved my rifle in half.

Throwing the half in my hand at the Jedi's face, I pressed forward as he flinched, Dooku's training coming to the forefront as I pushed an advantage against an enemy that was better trained than me.

But I had one distinct advantage over my enemy. I had been trained by and fought against a master of Jedi dueling. But, I wasn't a duelist at heart. I, was a soldier, so I acted as a soldier would.

Rapidly exchanging blows, I read my opponent's movements from body language, eventually locking blades as my eyes darted back and forth searching for any form of weakness. "Siri!" I snatched my pistol off of my hip while holding enemy lightsaber in place, eventually sliding it off and into the floor while I swept my foot up and into his face, "I could use some help here!" I squeezed the trigger of my handgun while I held it at my hip, the slide rocking back and forth as I pulled the trigger as rapidly as it reset, the rounds bouncing off of some sort of body armor before one of the rounds found purchase and the enemy snarled, his hand darting in a slashing motion sending a large chunk of debris at me and launching me out of the already broken skyscraper window.

"Corellian nine hells!" Sturn swore, dumping a magazine into the back of the Dark Jedi now that the Colonel was clear, the heavy rounds carving a bloody swathe through his torso. "We've got a man out the window, he's going to need a rescue before he ends up as bloody paste all over the undercity!"
It took me a moment to regain my bearings as I fell through the Coruscanti sky, my hand still holding an ignited violet blade. Shaking my head, I thumbed the activation switch, fighting against the air around me to tuck the hilt of the lightsaber into my belt before spreading out into the position we'd all been trained on.

I knew that coms would be useless with the wind rushing through my mic so I focused on what I could do, and found that it wasn't all that much. Any attempt to arrest my momentum with a cable or anything would result in broken bones at the smallest, and with me dead at the worst.

I wanted to freak out, but I had entered into that weird state of calm that always seemed to happen after the worst accidents I'd ever been in, from totaled car wrecks, to broken bones, it wouldn't faze me until after the worst had passed by.

So, for what seemed like minutes, but was only a few seconds in reality, I took stock of what I had in my possession, pistol, check, lightsaber, check. Duster, check.

Duster, I could use that.

Shrugging the coat down, I grabbed on and allowed it to billow out, the air catching and slowing me down with a sharp jolt, my left arm groaning as a collarbone that was already sore protested at the torture I was putting it through.

Now slowed down, I looked up just as a slow moving open topped tour bus glided through the air, my legs catching on part of it and driving the wind out of me while I slid down into the seat at the back.

The occupants of the bus simply stared at me, my odd uniform and weapons marking me as different, and not to be messed with.

Holding up a hand, I indicated for them to wait as I held a hand to my chest and stood up, catching my breath for a second. "I need to speak to the driver."

"You can have whatever you want!" a man shielded his family. "Just leave my family out of this."

"I don't want any of your shit," I rolled my eyes as I limped to the front of the bus. "I've got to get back to my people."







"No!" Sturn and a giant of a man clad in Mithril grabbed Siri and pulled her back from the window. "We're not sending anyone back out there without a vehicle or an escort to recover the body."

"But he's still alive, I can sense it," Siri protested.

"Leave it," Cassius looked at the Jedi Knight. "These men know what they are doing."

"You think we don't want to go after him?" Sturn asked, his knuckles white around his rifle. "Of course we do, but we have a responsibility to those who are here and alive. And if we leave now, whose going to ensure that the Representative or Ms. Sienn here are kept alive?"

"We've got a team heading down to the likely landing point now," the giant unpolarized his faceplate. "Knight Tachi, I know that you were friends with the Colonel, but we need you to liaison with the Jedi on this. The last time something like this happened was on Naboo, and I'd hate for this to come back to haunt us or the Confederacy due to us not following proper protocol."

"Right," Siri closed her eyes, taking her emotions and releasing them into the force, allowing the peace and light to fill and calm her before she exhaled, driving the fear and worry out with the rest of the turmoil. "I'll need to contact the Order and Count Dooku right away."

"I'll get you access, the Mithril-clad man nodded. "I'm Captain Mathis, any authorization you need can go with my stamp of approval."

The man gestured for another person to come over, an antenna pointing over the woman's shoulder.

"Knight Tachi, Corporal Schmitt here will help you with whatever you need," Mathis locked eyes with the Jedi before his faceplate repolarized and he turned away and began barking orders, a couple of fireteams moving to block any police from entering while another group contacted the Katana and began requesting extra hands on deck to begin documenting the scene.

"No, you're not allowed to pass," Mathis glared at a Coruscanti police officer as he tried to enter.

"Look, I'm here to take Representative Clay and Colonel Hull into protective custody," the officer began to sweat. "I'm trying to make sure they're safe."

"We've got that well under control," Mathis stated coldly. "Now, you and your fellow officers can leave. Or we will remove you… By force if we must."

"I'll go ask my superiors what they want me to do," the officer walked away, not willing to turn his back on the soldier. "But I'm not sure they'll back down."

"Then it is up to you to convince them," Mathis's HMG shifted in his grip. "Or they can come speak in person, and I'll persuade them. But you will not cross this threshold."








"Thanks for the ride," I nodded at the family that owned the tour bus. "Sorry for the mess," I glanced at the blood I'd left behind. "I'll make sure that you're compensated for the loss of revenue."

I then turned and looked at the tower.

"And I just bet the fuckin' elevator's broken," I muttered as I entered and looked up at how many flights of stairs I would have to climb if the elevator was indeed broken.

"Welcome, how may I help you today?" someone asked as I entered and headed for the elevator.

"Look," I glanced at the Zabrak. "I'm trying to get back to the top," I shook my head. "Or as close as I can get."

"Are you alright sir?" He glanced at the bloodied uniform and the way I was cradling my left shoulder. "I can get you to a hospital."

"No," I shook my head. "I've got to get back to my people, and I can't trust anyone in the hospital."

"Well, the elevator is working, but it only goes up halfway," the Zabrak pointed out. "You'll have to take another elevator and quite a few flights of stairs to reach the hotel portion on the upper levels."

"Of course I do," I sighed, walking to the elevator and punching the button for the tallest floor. "Because what else was going to happen?"
 
Chapter 55

MarkWarrior

Well-known member
Chapter 55​


“No, you may not pass,” Mathis glared at the robed figure attempting to enter the now completely secured hotel room.

“It’s our responsibility to see to it that this is properly investigated,” Windu crossed his arms. “You will let us pass.”

“No, I won’t,” the Giant of a man before putting on Mithril towered over the small group of Jedi. “My team is going over things now. If you want to assist with our internal investigation you can follow the rules and procedures detailed in Bill 103, subsection 3.2 recently passed by the Confederacy of Independent Systems. As mercenaries directly contracted to provide security to Representative Clay, we’re not to allow anyone under the command of a foreign nation to investigate until we’ve completed one of our own.”

“But you’re not in the Confederacy, and this is under the Jurisdiction of the Republic,” a second Jedi argued as Windu stared at Mathis.

“Actually,” a female voice spoke up from behind them, a small group of guards surrounding her.“This building from floors one Thousand and five to the top floor is designated as part of the Hapan Embassy, and as such, not under the Republic’s Jurisdiction, but instead to be internally managed by the Hapes Consortium. Now, we of Hapes respectfully ask that all police and investigative forces of the Republic leave until both ours and the Confederacy’s investigators are satisfied. We will share our findings once we are finished.”

“Anita Talpav,” Windu growled at the gray-haired woman.

“Ahh, Master Windu, it is always a pleasure to see you!” she smiled wide. “Would you like to know how-”

“We’re leaving,” Windu swept out of the room like a gust of wind, the few knights and masters following suit.

“Anita,” Clay smiled at the Hapan leader. “It’s been a while.”

“It has been too long,” she turned her attention to the older Representative. “I see that you’ve got quite a lot more gray than before.”

“I’m not the only one,” Clay chuckled. “Thanks for the assist by the way. It’s been rough keeping the Coruscanti police out, much less the Temple.”

“We are lucky that it was Windu and not another master,” the Hapan cautioned as she followed them into the destroyed room “I’ll not have leverage like that on another master.”

“Right,” Clay sighed. “And given the damages,” he gestured towards the wrecked room and the priceless furniture that had been scarred and destroyed by the skirmish. “We’ll pay for them, but there’s a bit of a problem.”

“Moreso than an assassination attempt?” Anita raised a refined eyebrow/

“Ha!” Clay gave a harsh barking laugh. “I wish it was just an unsuccessful assassination attempt. There was a Dark Jedi among their midst,” Clay pointed out the lightsaber damage. “Which means that the Jedi do have jurisdiction here. You know the treaty just as well as I do.”

“Please tell me that’s the last of it,” Anita pinched the bridge of her nose to stave off a headache.

“Colonel Hull’s lost, probably dead,” Clay sat down on a destroyed desk, leaning on his cane as he looked out the damaged window at the patrolling Archon’s Favor and squadron of ASF that supported her. “The Dark Jedi threw him out the window, and it’s a fucking long way down.”

“Fucking?” Anita mouthed before shaking her head with the new information. “That settles it, you’re going to war with the Republic soon enough.”

“I’m aware,” Clay sighed. “Hull’s group is extremely popular within the CIS, even though his group is mercenaries, they have recruitment across all of our worlds, and provide training to most planetary defense forces.”

“They’re thoroughly imbedded in your nation, aren’t they?” Anita asked.

“Aye,” Clay nodded. “For all that some make fun of them as ‘Dooku’s pet mercenaries’, they are more akin to the Confederacy's independent troubleshooters.”

“Cassius,” Anita looked him dead in the eye. “The ruling family is interested in negotiating, but we can’t until this mess is sorted out. I’m being given leeway in letting you stay in our Embassy, but you’ve got to get this handled, and soon. Before the Republic decides to rid itself of any need of a ‘Hapan’ embassy.”

“Anita, we’ll handle it,” Cassius grinned. “I’ve got some of the best people in the galaxy on it. We just need a little time.”

“And while those people investigate?” Anita raised an eyebrow.

“I’ll be taking care of the job I was sent here to do,” Clay’s eyes and voice hardened. “He enabled the slave trade that has ravished this Galaxy, and I’m going to see to it that he’s brought to justice. And then,” he turned and looked out the window. “Then I’m going to start working on the rest of the galaxy.”

“Always the same,” Anita stood up to leave. “Never change Cassius, never change.”

“After this is all said and done, we’ll have to get a drink,” Clay stood up to see her out. “I still haven’t gotten to hear what the Twins and their brother have gotten up to.”

“I’ll hold you to that,” Anita replied, moving to the elevator door as it slid open, a bloodied man falling from where he had been leaning on the doors.

“Medic!” Mathis jolted into action, his hands checking the pulse of the fallen. “Pulse is still strong.”

“I’ll take it from here,” the medic slid into view, his partner stopping to pull out scissors and begin cutting the gold and black clothing from the bearded man.

“We’ve got glass embedded into parts of him where it cut through his uniform,” the first medic began diagnosing the injuries. “He’s in partial shock, pulse is beginning to drop. We’ve got quite a bit of blood loss here too.”

“We need to get him to the Katana,” the Medic began putting pressure on the largest of the wounds. “He’ll need surgery for some of the glass.”

Archon’s Favor, we need a medevac on the roof,” Mathis’s voice stated on the radio. “And someone get Knight Tachi on the horn, She’s in the Undercity with Lieutenant Sturn trying to track down the Colonel.”

“What do we tell them?” the comms operator asked as he pulled the massive device off of his back.

“Tell them the VIP is secured, nothing else over an open channel,” Mathis responded.

“Well,” Anita turned to Cassius. “I suppose that’s one problem solved.”

“I certainly hope so,” he glanced at the downed Colonel.







“Representative,” Amidala glanced at the older man. “I’m glad to see that you’re alive and well.”

“It’s not the first time someone’s attempted to assassinate me,” he waved a hand. “I’m sure that you understand more than most.”

“Unfortunately, yes,” she frowned. “I wanted to let you know that I’ve managed to get some small support for your request. But it will be up to you to see to it that Orn Free Taa is released into your custody.”

“Indeed,” Clay nodded before turning and heading for his own pedestal.

“Are you sure you want to do things this way?” Lieutenant Sturn looked at Cassius.

“I’m old, and I find that I do not want to spend time in this cesspit any longer than necessary. It is better to offend and make an enemy than have an uncertain and untrustworthy neutral body.”

“The Chair recognizes the Representative of the Confederacy of Independent Systems,” Amedda exchanged glances with Palpatine, receiving a small nod in return.

“Thank you,” Clay stood up and leaned on his cane, his blaster now visible for all to see along with the weapons of his bodyguards. “People of the Republic,” he began and then let the silence settle fully upon the chambers.

“I am certain that many of you do not wish to hear the words that I have to say, so I will be utterly clear and concise. Orn Free Taa is not just the man responsible for the deaths of some of my countrymen and women. He is also responsible for allowing the slavery of his own people to continue unchecked. He has profited off of the harm of his own constituents, even breaking the Republic’s own laws in order to do so.”

Clay then pulled out a stack of various religious texts and set them on a table beside him. “For those of you who believe in the laws of gods, I make to you this argument against slavery and to return Orn Free Taa to our courts. For those of you who believe in the laws of the Republic, I set this argument before you,” he pulled out a copy of the Republic’s founding documents and set it beside the religious texts. “For those of you who believe in neither, I set to you this argument,” he set his blaster on the table and then sat down as the chamber erupted into chaos once more as a man fell onto the Representative’s platform, a blaster bolt flying from the man’s pistol and striking his chest, sending Clay to the ground as Lieutenant Sturn and his partner began to engage the other two assassins that had followed while Cassius Clay staggered to his feet, drawing a knife and stabbing the first assassin multiple times, sending the unarmored man to the afterlife before turning and addressing the Senate floor.

“You have one more chance to hand Orn Free Taa over,” Clay spat blood onto the ground. “Before I come for him myself. I have been attacked twice now, a third will ensure that I no longer operate under your laws, but instead the Confederacy’s.”
 

The Whispering Monk

Well-known member
Osaul
Cassius Clay staggered to his feet, drawing a knife and stabbing the first assassin multiple times, sending the unarmored man to the afterlife before turning and addressing the Senate floor.
I was wondering how much of an influence the real life Cassius Marcellus Clay was going to play.
Nice!

For those that don't know, I give you the Fat Electrician:

 

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