Amazon Prime Rings of Power: Lord of the Rings on Amazon

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Rusty Shackleford said:
I am asking people at least try to go a least a little deeper in their criticism than 'Muh black hobbits' 'muh culture war' 'muh rings of power is woke' we shouldn't be complaining about the same shit we already know in an endlessly repeating loop with no sustenance added I want a more Indepth analysis of this shit as to why it conflicts with Tolkiens vison beyond the culture war itself, not repeated one off single paragraph comments.
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Until the show actually airs, all we have is trailers and commentary from interviews, so naturally it's going to be complaining about the same shit we already know. And then it'll turn into that even after the show airs as we endlessly bash on it just like we are still bashing on The Last Jedi years after that movie came out. Hell, some of us are still bashing on the prequels, because for us, that's the only entertainment we can derive from them.
 


The world was young, the mountains green,
No stain yet on the Moon was seen,
No words were laid on stream or stone
When Durin woke and walked alone.
He named the nameless hills and dells;
He drank from yet untasted wells;
He stooped and looked in Mirrormere,
And saw a crown of stars appear,
As gems upon a silver thread,
Above the shadow of his head.

The world was fair, the mountains tall,
In Elder Days before the fall
Of mighty kings in Nargothrond
And Gondolin, who now beyond
The Western Seas have passed away:
The world was fair in Durin's Day.

A king he was on carven throne
In many-pillared halls of stone
With golden roof and silver floor,
And runes of power upon the door.
The light of sun and star and moon
In shining lamps of crystal hewn
Undimmed by cloud or shade of night
There shone for ever fair and bright.

There hammer on the anvil smote,
There chisel clove, and graver wrote;
There forged was blade, and bound was hilt;
The delver mined, the mason built.
There beryl, pearl, and opal pale,
And metal wrought like fishes' mail,
Buckler and corslet, axe and sword,
And shining spears were laid in hoard.

Unwearied then were Durin's folk;
Beneath the mountains music woke:
The harpers harped, the minstrels sang,
And at the gates the trumpets rang.

The world is grey, the mountains old,
The forge's fire is ashen-cold;
No harp is wrung, no hammer falls:
The darkness dwells in Durin's halls;
The shadow lies upon his tomb
In Moria, in Khazad-dûm.
But still the sunken stars appear
In dark and windless Mirrormere;
There lies his crown in water deep,
Till Durin wakes again from sleep.
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Watched the first episode.

It's bad. Not even "it's so bad it's good". It's just not entertaining to watch. Almost all of the characters are unlikeable, either being boring as doorknobs or being actively unpleasant. The only characters I didn't dislike were the hobbit girl and the black elf archer, and even then they're not likeable, just not aggravating like the others. Dialogue is bad and there were at least a couple instances of extremely juvenile exchanges. I certainly wouldn't expect noble elves to be casually making light of human-elf relationships, or a guy literally saying "your mom cut herself, didn't she? Haha that's probably why your dad left" (I'm not joking this literally happened).

The show looks visually unappealing. The costumes either look like the artists didn't even try, or look like cheap cosplays. There are compositing problems and the CGI monsters are weightless. Also, outside of the scenes that take place at Lindon, the show has this grey desaturated look. There are also disconcerting extreme close up shots, and the camera can never seem to sit still for more than 2 or 3 seconds. In some cases there were shots that lasted barely half a second and it very disorienting. Also, the music is forgettable.

It was an hour long episode and nothing happened except a guy falling out of the sky at the end, presumably a Maia. Won't watch anymore. They had an hour to get me to care about any of the characters or interested in the plot, or even hook me with the promise of spectacle, and failed. Why bother watching this show when I could go to Youtube and watch an episode of Bonanza that has entertaining characters and tells a compelling story from beginning to end in 45 minutes? Also that show actually looks good with the colors and set design and decent cinematography.

What boggles my mind is that this is a $700 million show. This is like, the most expensive show in the history ever, since Game of Thrones. You'd think that there would be top of the line talent on this show. Good cinematographers. Good actors. Writers who would make the dialogue not cringe. The best costume designers. The best in the CGI industry. Good musicians. Where did the money go?

If you compare this to House of the Dragon, that show at least didn't have most of its cast being unlikeable. At least the sets looked pretty decent (even if I wished they were better lit). At least the compositing of the backgrounds was good enough. At least the dialogue wasn't embarrassing. At least some of the costumes looked good (even if they don't come through because of the color grading that sucked the colors out of everything). At least there was some stuff that was vaguely interesting in the first episode like the king's hopes and dreams being shattered. Music was trash in both, though. Seriously, why can't Hollywood hire decent musicians?
 
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Val the Moofia Boss said:
Watched the first episode.

It's bad. Not even "it's so bad it's good". It's just not entertaining to watch. Almost all of the characters are unlikeable, either being boring as doorknobs or being actively unpleasant. The only characters I didn't dislike were the hobbit girl and the black elf archer, and even then they're not likeable, just not aggravating like the others. Dialogue is bad and there were at least a couple instances of extremely juvenile exchanges. I certainly wouldn't expect noble elves to be casually making light of human-elf relationships, or a guy literally saying "your mom cut herself, didn't she? Haha that's probably why your dad left" (I'm not joking this literally happened).

The show looks visually unappealing. The costumes either look like the artists didn't even try, or look like cheap cosplays. There are compositing problems and the CGI monsters are weightless. Also, outside of the scenes that take place at Lindon, the show has this grey desaturated look. There are also disconcerting extreme close up shots, and the camera can never seem to sit still for more than 2 or 3 seconds. In some cases there were shots that lasted barely half a second and it very disorienting. Also, the music is forgettable.

It was an hour long episode and nothing happened except a guy falling out of the sky at the end, presumably a Maia. Won't watch anymore. They had an hour to get me to care about any of the characters or interested in the plot, or even hook me with the promise of spectacle, and failed. Why bother watching this show when I could go to Youtube and watch an episode of Bonanza that has entertaining characters and tells a compelling story from beginning to end in 45 minutes? Also that show actually looks good with the colors and set design and decent cinematography.

What boggles my mind is that this is a $700 million show. This is like, the most expensive show in the history ever, since Game of Thrones. You'd think that there would be top of the line talent on this show. Good cinematographers. Good actors. Writers who would make the dialogue not cringe. The best costume designers. The best in the CGI industry. Good musicians. Where did the money go?

If you compare this to House of the Dragon, that show at least didn't have most of its cast being unlikeable. At least the sets looked pretty decent (even if I wished they were better lit). At least the compositing of the backgrounds was good enough. At least the dialogue wasn't embarrassing. At least some of the costumes looked good (even if they don't come through because of the color grading that sucked the colors out of everything). At least there was some stuff that was vaguely interesting in the first episode like the king's hopes and dreams being shattered. Music was trash in both, though. Seriously, why can't Hollywood hire decent musicians?
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Is galadriel a badass warrior chick raging against the patriarchy? are the elves all gay?
 
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AnimalNoodles said:
I galadriel a badass warrior chick raging against the patriarchy? are the elves all gay?
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I refuse to give Amazon money & time by watching this, and frankly I probably won't even waste my time watching this like a Corsair of Umbar would. But from what I've heard from multiple sources, it is true that the show starts with young Galadriel being bullied by other Elf boys who sink a paper boat-turned-swan that she makes & getting into a fistfight with them, even though the Elves' time in Valinor during the Years of the Trees was supposed to be their paradisaical Garden of Eden period and violence of any kind was unheard of among the Eldar until Morgoth helps Ungoliant destroy the Two Trees, murders the Noldor king Finwë & runs off with the Silmarils (followed by the Noldor massacring their fellow Elves, the Teleri, to steal their ships and pursue Morgoth to Middle-earth - cue the best-known events of the First Age). This really sets the tone for how she will be, in the words of the same reviewer who said Elrond's gay now, both a Mary Sue & a Karen going forward.

Also I saw a clip uploaded to Kiwifarms, where the black Elf character is called a knife-ear in a pub (I guess there's a Dragon Age fan on the writing team?) and accosted by a scrawny white MAGA Morgoth worshiper, who alternates between complaining that the generation of his people who fought for Morgoth is long gone so it's unfair to hold them responsible for the sins of their ancestors in the present day and ranting that their 'true king' will come to liberate them from Elven oppression any day now (one of the titles Morgoth claimed was 'King of the World'). They couldn't have made this analogy for CRT and how slavery is the unforgivable Original Sin for whitey any more on-the-nose if they tried.
 
Are Tolkien elves even stated to have pointed ears? Because AFAIK, 'elves have pointed ears' is a later invention.
 
gral said:
Are Tolkien elves even stated to have pointed ears? Because AFAIK, 'elves have pointed ears' is a later invention.
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They do. Hobbit ears are described as "slightly pointy and elvish", contrasted to completely round human ears. Also, I managed to find this:
LAS(1)- *lasse leaf: Q lasse, N lhass; [...] (Some think this is related to the next and * lasse 'ear' . The Quendian ears were more pointed and leaf. shaped than [?human].) (HoME 5, Etymologies)
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Four minutes in and I'm bored because Elf Children are boring.

Can't wait for the Dark Elves and their Black Arks show up and make things interesting.

Update:

Fifteen minutes into the show and I'm still pretty bored. There was a bit of a neat narrative but it lasted like a minute. Ain't like the epic intro at the top of the Fellowship of the Ring. But back to boring now.

Also its weird when the subtitles say [In English] when they are speaking the tongues of Man. it was a weird moment that kinda took me out of it even more. :p

Oh Good, Hobbits are onscreen. I'm sure things will be more exciting now. :cautious:

Update 2:

I was playing a Siege Battle in Total Warhammer III for the last half of the episode so I didn't quite catch what happened. Then the game crashed just when I won... grim tidings. Or maybe it's a message. I dunno.
 
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Apparently, Amazon has suspended reviews entirely. MSM is hard on the case doing damage control and explaining that actually people love it and it's just an organized group of review bombers ruining things for everybody.

www.forbes.com

'Rings Of Power' Is Getting Review Bombed So Hard Amazon Suspended Reviews Entirely

Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power is getting slammed essentially everywhere that accepts fan reviews: On Rotten Tomatoes, while its critics score is 84%, it has a 36% audience score.
www.forbes.com www.forbes.com
 
Bear Ribs said:
Apparently, Amazon has suspended reviews entirely. MSM is hard on the case doing damage control and explaining that actually people love it and it's just an organized group of review bombers ruining things for everybody.

www.forbes.com

'Rings Of Power' Is Getting Review Bombed So Hard Amazon Suspended Reviews Entirely

Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power is getting slammed essentially everywhere that accepts fan reviews: On Rotten Tomatoes, while its critics score is 84%, it has a 36% audience score.
www.forbes.com www.forbes.com
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Ahhh...I see...the negative reviews can't be really bad because the show was bad. They are the result of politically motivated hacks who are racist. Gotcha...
 
Bear Ribs said:
Apparently, Amazon has suspended reviews entirely. MSM is hard on the case doing damage control and explaining that actually people love it and it's just an organized group of review bombers ruining things for everybody.

www.forbes.com

'Rings Of Power' Is Getting Review Bombed So Hard Amazon Suspended Reviews Entirely

Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power is getting slammed essentially everywhere that accepts fan reviews: On Rotten Tomatoes, while its critics score is 84%, it has a 36% audience score.
www.forbes.com www.forbes.com
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They are such bloody cowards.
 
To be fair a Boring ass first two episodes of Rings of Power is perfectly in line with Tolkiens vision. I remember as a wee lass struggling to get through the first hundred pages of Fellowship of the Ring.

If you are complaining about the first season of Rings of Power being incomprehensibly boring you aren't real Tolkien fans and would know this is exactly what his vision would want. Proportionately the first season has to be incomprehensibly boring because they're planning on milking this franchise for at least a few hundred years of History which means at least ten seasons minimum.
 
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