Asociality

[Jessica Atreides]

Okay, can we get back to thread topic

I'll be honest with you: I think a cry for help is the actual topic of this thread, whether you intended it to be or not.

There are a couple overlapping elements at play from what I am seeing:

• An existing psychological condition you are experiencing. I'm not qualified to diagnose someone (and if I was I wouldn't because it would naturally be against professional ethics to do so without you as a patient), but you show a number of flags that definitely seem to indicate a personality disorder. That's not a value judgement, before you take that the wrong way.
• I would wager your dad has something going on as well that's making him go in the direction he's choosing with this.
• Your dad's unhealthy coping mechanisms. He's clearly violating your boundaries and making you extremely uncomfortable. He's definitely not on any reasonable road to recovery from what happened and he's dragging you down with him. It's about the worst way I could imagine to deal with what happened.
• Your co-dependent relationship with your family.

Yes, the obvious answer would be to be more independent, but I don't really think that's something you're capable of right now, psychologically or practically, so I'm not going to push that angle. Everyone involved here needs some serious, professional help. It is absolutely not good for you as a person for your father to force you and others to sleep in his room. Its not good for him as a person to force everyone to do so. This is a particularly weird version of a typical response to trauma.

Professional help would be the best for everyone but at minimum your father needs some counseling for the trauma he's experiencing.

 

[CarlManvers2019]

• I would wager your dad has something going on as well that's making him go in the direction he's choosing with this.
• Your dad's unhealthy coping mechanisms. He's clearly violating your boundaries and making you extremely uncomfortable. He's definitely not on any reasonable road to recovery from what happened and he's dragging you down with him. It's about the worst way I could imagine to deal with what happened.

It’s only been nearly a month since it all happened and admittedly he’s forced me and others to sleep next to him because he wants/needs company

Thing is, he gets really pissed off when I refuse

Yeah, he lets me off on my own most of the time, but mostly when it involves sleep he keeps insisting I come

For now he hasn’t gotten suddenly really impatient for me to be with him.

Though he does keep having me checked on, I keep telling to not need to check on me, that he already knows the answer that I don’t want or need to eat 7pm

 

[CarlManvers2019]

• I would wager your dad has something going on as well that's making him go in the direction he's choosing with this.
• Your dad's unhealthy coping mechanisms. He's clearly violating your boundaries and making you extremely uncomfortable. He's definitely not on any reasonable road to recovery from what happened and he's dragging you down with him. It's about the worst way I could imagine to deal with what happened

Say, how bad do you think he has whatever this thing is

He really wants me around and keeps expecting me to just follow along, and keeps going “You are not happy!?” when I keep rejecting wanting to be with him or be brought down

It’s like he can’t tell my obvious reactions

 

[Jessica Atreides]

Say, how bad do you think he has whatever this thing is

I literally can't say. I can see your thought processes but not his, so I would not even hazard a guess at what long term psychological issues he may have.

However, the most obvious thing based on what you've said is that at a minimum he's exerting greater control over others in an attempt to deal with trauma. This itself is a pretty common coping mechanism, albeit an extremely unhealthy one. However he's also taken it to a weird new level by forcing everyone to sleep with him.

 

[CarlManvers2019]

I literally can't say. I can see your thought processes but not his, so I would not even hazard a guess at what long term psychological issues he may have.

However, the most obvious thing based on what you've said is that at a minimum he's exerting greater control over others in an attempt to deal with trauma. This itself is a pretty common coping mechanism, albeit an extremely unhealthy one. However he's also taken it to a weird new level by forcing everyone to sleep with him.

You know it’s been a few weeks since this was a thing

Gotta say, I’m mostly feeling better, even had two psychologist visits for the family

That said, REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY fucking stressed at times

At times

Well, I made some concession to be allowed to sleep in my room three days a week

That said, even being made to be with family for maybe an hour stresses me out.....I fucking HATE family meals

Them and their obsession with small talk and stories or my dad doing lectures on life+stories

Well, at least I haven’t forced myself through lots of documents I can’t stand and increase my stress

Just felt like saying thanks, even one guy accepting or realizing I have problems instead of just saying to “nut up” helps, I already used to deal with the latter from my brother who was BAD at teaching me anything business related and I was stuck with him for more than a year

 

[CarlManvers2019]

You know guys, whoever Is still sorta watching this thread, I think

10 Signs You've Pissed an Introvert Off - Psych2Go

Introverts can be pretty hard to read. That's why we've compiled a list of ten signs you've pissed off an introvert, so you can tread carefully.

psych2go.net

This article kinda describes my current problems or kinda what I'm like

Honestly, I can barely stand being "checked on" or having even a minute long conversation and just keep ending things with "yes" or "okay" and hope they leave me alone

Especially now....that I'm stuck with him due to quarantine