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Ask and ye shall recieve: Fleischwurst.

Looking at THIS article, it looks like Doctor Sausage is made with higher quality meat. In short? Bologna is for plebs while DS is for the pats.

Cheese out the wazoo, sour cream by the bucket, butter by the block, and salt by the container. These are the three ingredients used to make the perfect little potatoes. But then another ingredient was added by accident...

I try my best to only eat the THICCest of pizzas.

I cook more smallish pizzas. Unless I'm cooking for my family, in which case I just use several pans at once.

I just use a normal pan with some aluminium foil on top of it for easy cleaning.

Ever had Pinecone Jam? It's a Russian 'Babushka' recipe, I am told, but very good.

I had fish eyes. In a bowl. Served to me directly as the 'birthday boy'.

Yeah, Korean BBQ is crazy good if you can stand all the Kimchi. ;)

I just recently came across this thing called a Reese's Pieces Klondike bar, and it is quite possibly the greatest ice cream bar I've ever come across. Much of the same though, I've never really cared for peanut butter otherwise.

Okay, I put apple butter on my vanilla ice cream, ranch dressing on my pizza, pineapple on both my pizza and burgers, and salt on my raw tomatoes, but that is something that even I will not do.

The mashed type. My Grandma always used to just take mashed potatoes, add flour and butter, and (deep?)fry the things in either more butter or some form of oil.

YES. All of the yes. Put a buttload of butter on top and I just consume them on the spot.

Here are just a few examples I found-- all you really need is some American ingenuity and you'll have a cake in no time. Also, if you like strawberries and blueberries they're delicious.

I would recommend that you bake the Mac n Cheese at least, maybe put some bread crumbs on top. Also, instead of Mississippi Mud Cake, maybe try an apple pie, or a vanilla cake with an American flag on top-- can't get much more American than that. All in all, I'd give your party nine Americas...

Begone, you and your hot tea alike. ;) My favorite tea I can't even begin to type, let alone pronounce. It's a Vietnamese brand of Green Tea, fruity edition. It's best cold, but it can be drunk lukewarm as well. I would not recommend drinking it within four hours of going to bed either-- it's...