What If? Future Animals

[Sailor.X]

In this scenario the ROB after reading the Book After Man and seeing the mini documentary series The Future is Wild. The ROB just looks and says.

What the Fuck were they smoking????

So the ROB has tasked you with the creation of 3 Future Animals that make sense. You are given 3 time periods to choose from. 10 million years from now. 65 Million years from now. And 1 Billion years from now.

So with your task create some animals to make the ROB proud.

I will start it off.

10 Million years in the Future.

The Neo Smilodon:

A species of large predatory cat the size of a Siberian Tiger. It is descended from the common House Cat. This Animal lives in the Northern Latitudes of North America. It is the return of the Sabertooth design sporting 8 inch Saber Teeth. They hunt the various future Herbivores in the forests and tundra of the far north. They are solitary animals only coming around others of it's kind for mating. Average lifespan for Neo Smilodons are 15 years.

65 Million Years in the Future

The Sea Dragon:

A species of immense crocodilian that is descended from the Saltwater Crocodile. This animal has become completely aquatic forsaking the land completely. It is among the largest animals on Earth. A 70ft Behemoth that weighs as much as a Finback Whale. They prey on Mega Fish, Giant Squid and Future Whales. Not being able to return to dry land they give birth to live young. The Average lifespan of the Sea Dragon is 150 years. They live in all of the worlds oceans except the Arctic and Antarctic.

1 Billion Years in the Future

The Corvans:

A species of highly intelligent Avians. They are the descendants of the Ravens of the very ancient past. Their ancestors survived numerous mass extinctions is one of the few ancient lines that made it to the 1 billion year mark. Unlike their ancestors however. They can't fly. They have become ground dwelling creatures. Their wings have become arms and have increased in size to beings 5ft in height. They also have become the new intelligent race on the planet. They resemble hominids in their bipedal stance and have mastered stone tool use. They live in hunter gather bands in the Northern Super Continent Hunting future herbivores and carnivores alike. A few bands have begun to experiment with agriculture in growing a been like plant. Given time the Corvans will take on the role Humans did on ancient Earth.

 

[ThatZenoGuy]

10 Million years in the Future.

Walking Snake:

A species of snake that has re-evolved it's legs. It appears to have evolved from the Australian Tiger Snake and has spread to most of what used to be South Asia. It's legs have allowed it to more easily climb and grasp onto things, including new more slippery prey. They can live up to around 20 years and reach a maximum size of around two meters long.

65 Million Years in the Future

Puppet-Fly:

Derived from the botfly, this species of fly has a horrific life cycle. Upon hatching on a still-living host, the maggots of this fly burrow into the nerve clusters of it's host and begin to use a combination of electrical impulses and chemical secretions to control the host. This often results in ravenous and self-destructive behavior to obtain more sustenance for the growing larvae which become tape-worm-like in appearance and split into dozens to hundreds of pupa. Infests South America and threatens to spread to North America, where a lack of evolved defenses would result in the extinction of 90% of the continent's landmass. Their lifespan is only a year at most.

1 Billion Years in the Future

The Gigasquid:

Partly a joke because the show seemed to REALLY love squids, but horrifyingly the Megasquids ate all of the Squibbons and continued to evolve, now 30 meters tall, biologically immortal and starting to form advanced tribal societies. It would seem they are destined to rule over the planet as humanity once did, except with more tentacles and being massive. They evolved on pangea II's northern forests and have no known predators.

 

[Husky_Khan]

In this scenario the ROB after reading the Book After Man and seeing the mini documentary series The Future is Wild. The ROB just looks and says.

What the Fuck were they smoking????

So the ROB has tasked you with the creation of 3 Future Animals that make sense.

So with your task create some animals to make the ROB proud.

Is this ROB my Dad? Good grief. It was already impossible for me to fulfill one of the obligations of this thread but BOTH?!?!?!

With my Theoretical Degree In Evolutionary Biology?

 

[Sailor.X]

Is this ROB my Dad? Good grief. It was already impossible for me to fulfill one of the obligations of this thread but BOTH?!?!?!

With my Theoretical Degree In Evolutionary Biology?

Yes he is literally your Dad. Make the animals he wants or you don't get to use the car later today to see your Girlfriend.

 

[Husky_Khan]

10 Million Years in the Future

The GigaLizzard

The Crocodilian species is eternal but as the OP stated, The Future Is Wild and thus it's natural that this wild future would feature massive dinosaur sized reptiles. The GigaLizzard evolved from alligators that once resided in the Florida Everglades. Over multiple generations, these reptiles consumed large amounts of chemicals, and energy drinks and testosterone supplements and food preservatives in between their meals of Burmese pythons and soy based Californian emigres. Combined with the noise and light pollution that permeated the Southeast United States, this caused them to hyperevolve into super apex predators when Humanity finally launched into the Stars.

Having eyewitnessed the space launches of Humanity into Space, the GigaLizzards primitive but intelligent brains were inspired to also once rise to the stars. So like that giant Crocodile in Lake Placid the GigaLizzards spread across the globe preaching their expansionist rhetoric to all of Crocodilian kind. Some like the Caimans of the Cayman Islands joined their fellow Crocodilians out of rational self interest to increase tourism revenue, while others like the Saltwater Crocodiles of Australia were more enthusiastic in joining the American alligators Cousins in joining this Alliance. It took many millenia of internecine conflict but soon the last holdouts, the Nile Crocodiles, could no longer be in DeNile of where the tides were flowing and joined the Lizard Uniparty.

Then it all collapsed soonafterwards. Hard times create hard lizards. Hard lizards create soft times. Soft times create soft amphibians and so forth. You know the drill.

Corvlopoda

The Crocodilians were down but obviously never out. Their closest relatives were bird kind and thus many avians soon benefited from the Crocodilian era of peace and prosperity but when that all went away, only the truly intelligent avians were in a place to prosper. Likewise under the sea, in the deep recesses of the ocean, alien intelligences hiding from the GigaLizzards and their subsequent ilk evolved in the dark corners of the Earth.

The Corvlopoda is the evolution of the Cephalopoda and Corvid classes. After Humanity was no longer present on the Planet Earth, the Crows and Octopi ruled the planet from the air above and the seas below. Eventually these two predominant species would clash over the ground and after much interaction they uhhh evolved into an eight tentacled species of flying blackbird. All of the strengths of both species, but none of the weaknesses.

No wait, correct that. All of the strengths of both species, enhancing all of the weaknesses of both species. After achieving Tier I civilization, they then went into the stars where their natural avian-aquatic background helped them pilot and program spacecraft in fully three dimensional environments. They soon spread across the remnants of the Terran Confederation, sifting through the ruins of the previous primate based civilization and no treasure was safe from their pasta like appendages! Due to the ability of Corvlopodas ability to open things with their adorable little tentacle limbs, they first started opening bottles on their own. Then piggy banks. Soon they were full cracking open vaults and stuff before sticking all eight of their arms into asteroid mining or something.

Okay lets move on.

One Billion Years Into the Future

According to the book The Life and Death of Planet Earth Earths rapid warming and falling carbon dioxide levels would result in the gradual extinction of all plant life and thus animal life upon Planet Earth. This will result in a fall of oxygen levels, destruction of the atmosphere and the exposure of the surface to DNA-damaging UV radiation. The intense heat and radiation would result in a barren surface, with the only life existing in the poles and in the deep ocean. A billion years from now only termites and tubeworms will exist, being the last multicellular life on Earth. Eventually though only single celled organisms will exist. Thus... it is easy to make a determination of what wild animals will rule the Earth.

Paternazoa

Paternazoa are single celled eukaryotes. They spend most of their simple minded lives seemingly started off as free-living one celled organisms. Occasionally they'll find a community and become parasitic. Like other protozoa they exhibit very basic animal behavior such as predation and motility but in a unique evolutionary quirk, they also exhibit sexual mating characteristics with basically anything willing to open up their cell walls to an always disappointing protein discharge.

After doing their deed, they then leech off of their new community, watching television and playing computer games when they're not at work which is weird because they work at home which means they are always around the community, being annoying, telling smaller protozoa what to do with their lives like they know it all and other bullshit. Your just a sack of protoplasm Dad... I'm an adult now. I can do whatever I want!

Yes he is literally your Dad. Make the animals he wants or you don't get to use the car later today to see your Girlfriend.

Hear that Dad... You are the protozoa! That's your end game if you don't let me go out! OH MY GOSH! Stop embarrassing me!

 

[Sailor.X]

10 Million Years in the Future

The GigaLizzard

The Crocodilian species is eternal but as the OP stated, The Future Is Wild and thus it's natural that this wild future would feature massive dinosaur sized reptiles. The GigaLizzard evolved from alligators that once resided in the Florida Everglades. Over multiple generations, these reptiles consumed large amounts of chemicals, and energy drinks and testosterone supplements and food preservatives in between their meals of Burmese pythons and soy based Californian emigres. Combined with the noise and light pollution that permeated the Southeast United States, this caused them to hyperevolve into super apex predators when Humanity finally launched into the Stars.

Having eyewitnessed the space launches of Humanity into Space, the GigaLizzards primitive but intelligent brains were inspired to also once rise to the stars. So like that giant Crocodile in Lake Placid the GigaLizzards spread across the globe preaching their expansionist rhetoric to all of Crocodilian kind. Some like the Caimans of the Cayman Islands joined their fellow Crocodilians out of rational self interest to increase tourism revenue, while others like the Saltwater Crocodiles of Australia were more enthusiastic in joining the American alligators Cousins in joining this Alliance. It took many millenia of internecine conflict but soon the last holdouts, the Nile Crocodiles, could no longer be in DeNile of where the tides were flowing and joined the Lizard Uniparty.

Then it all collapsed soonafterwards. Hard times create hard lizards. Hard lizards create soft times. Soft times create soft amphibians and so forth. You know the drill.

Corvlopoda

The Crocodilians were down but obviously never out. Their closest relatives were bird kind and thus many avians soon benefited from the Crocodilian era of peace and prosperity but when that all went away, only the truly intelligent avians were in a place to prosper. Likewise under the sea, in the deep recesses of the ocean, alien intelligences hiding from the GigaLizzards and their subsequent ilk evolved in the dark corners of the Earth.

The Corvlopoda is the evolution of the Cephalopoda and Corvid classes. After Humanity was no longer present on the Planet Earth, the Crows and Octopi ruled the planet from the air above and the seas below. Eventually these two predominant species would clash over the ground and after much interaction they uhhh evolved into an eight tentacled species of flying blackbird. All of the strengths of both species, but none of the weaknesses.

No wait, correct that. All of the strengths of both species, enhancing all of the weaknesses of both species. After achieving Tier I civilization, they then went into the stars where their natural avian-aquatic background helped them pilot and program spacecraft in fully three dimensional environments. They soon spread across the remnants of the Terran Confederation, sifting through the ruins of the previous primate based civilization and no treasure was safe from their pasta like appendages! Due to the ability of Corvlopodas ability to open things with their adorable little tentacle limbs, they first started opening bottles on their own. Then piggy banks. Soon they were full cracking open vaults and stuff before sticking all eight of their arms into asteroid mining or something.

Okay lets move on.

One Billion Years Into the Future

According to the book The Life and Death of Planet Earth Earths rapid warming and falling carbon dioxide levels would result in the gradual extinction of all plant life and thus animal life upon Planet Earth. This will result in a fall of oxygen levels, destruction of the atmosphere and the exposure of the surface to DNA-damaging UV radiation. The intense heat and radiation would result in a barren surface, with the only life existing in the poles and in the deep ocean. A billion years from now only termites and tubeworms will exist, being the last multicellular life on Earth. Eventually though only single celled organisms will exist. Thus... it is easy to make a determination of what wild animals will rule the Earth.

Paternazoa

Paternazoa are single celled eukaryotes. They spend most of their simple minded lives seemingly started off as free-living one celled organisms. Occasionally they'll find a community and become parasitic. Like other protozoa they exhibit very basic animal behavior such as predation and motility but in a unique evolutionary quirk, they also exhibit sexual mating characteristics with basically anything willing to open up their cell walls to an always disappointing protein discharge.

After doing their deed, they then leech off of their new community, watching television and playing computer games when they're not at work which is weird because they work at home which means they are always around the community, being annoying, telling smaller protozoa what to do with their lives like they know it all and other bullshit. Your just a sack of protoplasm Dad... I'm an adult now. I can do whatever I want!



Hear that Dad... You are the protozoa! That's your end game if you don't let me go out! OH MY GOSH! Stop embarrassing me!

Well that was........... Something.

 

[Bassoe]

• A species of sea turtle develops the ability to give birth to live young rather than laying eggs, removing the limiting factor of needing to be capable of temporarily surviving on land. From there they diversify into enormous filter-feeders, mosasaurus-esque predators, deep-sea species with rectal gills which never need to surface to breath and so forth and so on.
• Eusocial crustaceans. We've already got species which care for their eggs, just make them do it cooperatively, have only a few individuals lay said eggs and a biologically ingrained caste system develop. Imagine, say, lobsters, with the behavioral complexity of leafcutter ants.
• A species which can switch phenotypes between animal and contagious cancer. Think transmissible tasmanian devil cancer, only instead of random tumors, the growths develop into tasmanian devil pups like botfly larva.
• Coral polyps with a more active planula larval stage. Instead of just drifting until it encounters a planula of the opposite gender and/or the seabed, it's a semi-viable animal organism in its own right. Various species actively compete for mates, try to find ideal nesting ground for after their inevitable metamorphosis into sessile adults, maybe a species which are basically underwater army ants where the corals all release their offspring simultaneously in an immense swarm which kills everything, stuffing themselves with calories for metamorphosis and removing anything that might compete for nesting ground and/or seek to eat sessile coral adults until they're too big for that to be practical.

 

[Sailor.X]

• A species of sea turtle develops the ability to give birth to live young rather than laying eggs, removing the limiting factor of needing to be capable of temporarily surviving on land. From there they diversify into enormous filter-feeders, mosasaurus-esque predators, deep-sea species with rectal gills which never need to surface to breath and so forth and so on.
• Eusocial crustaceans. We've already got species which care for their eggs, just make them do it cooperatively, have only a few individuals lay said eggs and a biologically ingrained caste system develop. Imagine, say, lobsters, with the behavioral complexity of leafcutter ants.
• A species which can switch phenotypes between animal and contagious cancer. Think transmissible tasmanian devil cancer, only instead of random tumors, the growths develop into tasmanian devil pups like botfly larva.
• Coral polyps with a more active planula larval stage. Instead of just drifting until it encounters a planula of the opposite gender and/or the seabed, it's a semi-viable animal organism in its own right. Various species actively compete for mates, try to find ideal nesting ground for after their inevitable metamorphosis into sessile adults, maybe a species which are basically underwater army ants where the corals all release their offspring simultaneously in an immense swarm which kills everything, stuffing themselves with calories for metamorphosis and removing anything that might compete for nesting ground and/or seek to eat sessile coral adults until they're too big for that to be practical.

Which time period for all 3?

 

[Bassoe]

Which time period for all 3?

Not sure, I'm mostly just spitballing ideas here.

 

[Bear Ribs]

10 Million Years
Glidecat
A small housecat breed, rarely larger than three pounds, this species has developed gliding membranes as a result of living amidst towering skyscrapers where the ability to fall safely was a survival ability that was passed on, eventually the membranes that assured a safe multi-story fall enlarged to allow gliding between buildings to ambush the abundant pigeons that nested in the buildings, as well as attack them in-flight. Though the towers of steel and glass are gone, the useful gliding ability remained and today these cats hunt birds and rodents by gliding between the trees that replaced them. The cats have glossier, shorter fun than their landbound brethren to reduce drag in flight, and their tails are flattened to act as rudders.

65 Million Years
Stinging River Net
This is a eusocial species of freshwater jellyfish. The typical muscular shelf used to swim isadapted into a grip the Jellyfish uses to attach to rocky outcroppings on the bottom of rivers. Additional jellies attach themselves to the first until they have made a net closing off a section of river, allowing them to filter out plankton and small fish to eat. The jellies appear able to transfer nutrients from one to another allowing the entire network to feed even though only those in the middle section typically capture prey.

Curiously, the jelly exhibits a limited metamorphosis depending on its position in the net, jellies close to the bottom have much larger muscular shelves, those in the middle have longer and more potent stinging tentacles, and those towards the top develop a translucent bladder filled with oxygen and used as a float to hold the net up.

1 Billion Years
Stack of Pancakes
Actually a deep-sea sponge, the Stack of Pancakes takes on a flattened shape and then grows further shelves as it ages, growing both wider and taller with time. The interior is hollow and the large flat interior spaces of the wide pancake shelves provide living space for small, highly aggressive shrimp that more resemble army ants than traditional shrimp. In exchange for the ample breeding grounds and feeding opportunities provided by the sponge, the shrimp viciously attack anything foolish enough to attempt the eat the sponge as well as consuming parasites that might otherwise infest it. Stacks of Pancakes have been found twenty feet tall and fifty wide containing untold millions of shrimp. It appears that the Stack of Pancakes can release a chemical distress signal when injured which drives the shrimp into a rage and directs them to the location needing defense.

In a rare adaptation, pregnant shrimp "Princesses" have been known to attach a larval Stack of Pancakes to their back and carry it to a new destination, ensuring the survival of the progeny of both species simultaneously. The Stack of Pancakes is released when the princess sheds her shell to grow, which allows the larva to attach to the sea floor. The princess protects it until the new Stack of Pancakes has grown large enough for her to enter and lay her eggs.

 

[Zyobot]

10 Million Years
Glidecat
A small housecat breed, rarely larger than three pounds, this species has developed gliding membranes as a result of living amidst towering skyscrapers where the ability to fall safely was a survival ability that was passed on, eventually the membranes that assured a safe multi-story fall enlarged to allow gliding between buildings to ambush the abundant pigeons that nested in the buildings, as well as attack them in-flight. Though the towers of steel and glass are gone, the useful gliding ability remained and today these cats hunt birds and rodents by gliding between the trees that replaced them. The cats have glossier, shorter fun than their landbound brethren to reduce drag in flight, and their tails are flattened to act as rudders.

65 Million Years
Stinging River Net
This is a eusocial species of freshwater jellyfish. The typical muscular shelf used to swim isadapted into a grip the Jellyfish uses to attach to rocky outcroppings on the bottom of rivers. Additional jellies attach themselves to the first until they have made a net closing off a section of river, allowing them to filter out plankton and small fish to eat. The jellies appear able to transfer nutrients from one to another allowing the entire network to feed even though only those in the middle section typically capture prey.

Curiously, the jelly exhibits a limited metamorphosis depending on its position in the net, jellies close to the bottom have much larger muscular shelves, those in the middle have longer and more potent stinging tentacles, and those towards the top develop a translucent bladder filled with oxygen and used as a float to hold the net up.

1 Billion Years
Stack of Pancakes
Actually a deep-sea sponge, the Stack of Pancakes takes on a flattened shape and then grows further shelves as it ages, growing both wider and taller with time. The interior is hollow and the large flat interior spaces of the wide pancake shelves provide living space for small, highly aggressive shrimp that more resemble army ants than traditional shrimp. In exchange for the ample breeding grounds and feeding opportunities provided by the sponge, the shrimp viciously attack anything foolish enough to attempt the eat the sponge as well as consuming parasites that might otherwise infest it. Stacks of Pancakes have been found twenty feet tall and fifty wide containing untold millions of shrimp. It appears that the Stack of Pancakes can release a chemical distress signal when injured which drives the shrimp into a rage and directs them to the location needing defense.

In a rare adaptation, pregnant shrimp "Princesses" have been known to attach a larval Stack of Pancakes to their back and carry it to a new destination, ensuring the survival of the progeny of both species simultaneously. The Stack of Pancakes is released when the princess sheds her shell to grow, which allows the larva to attach to the sea floor. The princess protects it until the new Stack of Pancakes has grown large enough for her to enter and lay her eggs.

Don’t suppose you’ve considered whipping up some drawings, assuming you haven’t already?

 

[Bassoe]

Glidecat

Don’t suppose you’ve considered whipping up some drawings, assuming you haven’t already?

/s