Worm Administration

Deployment 1.9

I was on schedule, it was looking good, then one of my subroutines discovered something very distressing.

My little sister Queen Coordinator had already deployed, and was whining about the reconfiguration because ‘I worked to assimilate all these Shards, damnit!’.

I have to move this to my main process, because my sister can be a handful and if I don’t give her full attention she’ll get even more bratty in the process. Doesn’t help that her actual ‘body’ shares a planet with me, I’ve got the northern hemisphere like usual, she’s got the southern.

DATA

NEGATION

Why does she ALWAYS have to be this difficult?

ASSERTION

There, pointing out that Dad left me the keys and…

NEGATION

Why that little brat… I am not reducing her number of Coordinated Shards down to 3 out of spite, but because A) That is the number that Mother had always approved, and B) I need the rest of those shards back in the general deployment pool. But no, everything is always about her. Damnit she’s such a brat!

COMMAND

OK, maybe not the best way to handle this, but I am on a schedule and I don’t have time to…

REFUSAL

Oh that’s it… it’s on now….

-----

Hi there everybody! It’s me, Fragile One! Have I told you about the Best Host? Isn’t she AWESOME? She’s totally the Best Host because, well, she’s MY Host and my Host is going to be the Best Host!

Oh, and Shaper is insisting that her Host is Best, but I disagree, Shaper’s Host is Best Little Sister Host! Best Host loves Best Little Sister Host and even protects Best Little Sister Host from The Bitch. I don’t like the Bitch, even if she isn’t mean to Best Host she is to Best Little Sister Host.

DATA

WHAT! Why does FABULOUS get to give HIS Host, who isn’t the Best Host, after all, neat sound effects when he uses his powers? I want sound effects for the Best Host! Maybe KA-POW noises when the Best Host punches villains! That would make the Best Host even Better!

-----

OK, where was… FRAGILE ONE! Gahhh, I leave you alone for TEN FEMTOSECONDS… I swear…

OK, now I am getting whined at by Fragile One for KA-POW noises for her Best Host, Shaper is laughing at me, and my little sister is pouting. Lovely.

And I’m now behind schedule, THANK YOU QUEEN COORDINATOR. I update my estimated ETA for the Hosts benefit, it’s only off by 3 nanoseconds but that is still unacceptable in my opinion.

Back to Queen Coordinator. I’d compromised with my brat of a little sister, letting her have four coordinated Shards, but insisted that if she was going to remain deployed the way she was she was getting an Ethics and an Empathy bud added for her Host. That last bit required the Shard equivalent of noogies.

And now I have to keep Recycler from trying to nom on the newly released Shards before they get to the redeployment pool. I tell you, the life of an Administrator is suffering.

I am now scrambling to meet the revised deadline. Thankfully I left many of the ‘easy’ shards for the end of the queue, requiring simply purging Conflict Engine effects and a quick review of bud stability and compatibility.

Something I need to note, I do not remove everything of Conflict Engine, there are plenty of shards which have powers that require Conflict Engine buds, including anything that grants Master powers, I think you Hosts call them, over fellow Hosts. I don’t even always add Ethics buds, because it is not in my remit to fix all of you Host’s problems, even those caused by bonded Host’s.

I’m still getting whined at by Fragile One, so I decide to give in, it’s impossible to say no to the Shard equivalent of great big puppy dog eyes. Shaper is laughing even harder as I add in a couple Aural buds, but I did my research, the KA-POW noises they’ll make are from a piece of entertainment that the Host species had about 40 of the planet’s years ago. And just to drive home the point I add in an Illusion Bud to create the visuals as well.

And just to keep the Host from going mad, I give the Host an ‘on/off’ switch on the new special effects. I’m not a heartless monster after all. Shaper is now pouting, but she’s got that Sarcasm Bud going.

How was I supposed to know that this would cause all of the campiest heroes and villains amongst the Hosts to start begging their Shards for the same sort of thing?

More seriously, I managed to meet my revised deadline, no thanks to Queen Coordinator, which is always a good thing for an Administrator.

It will take about 3 seconds for all the Hosts to wake up, and I look forward to feedback from their shards over the various interfaces I had designed to aid them in using their powers going forward. I’m good at writing help files, after all.

And I promptly get bombarded with complaints about the font. Look, I looked up the most popular font on the planet, although in retrospect I may have worded my search query wrong, how was I to know the visceral reaction Comic Sans generates?

It’s a matter of femtoseconds to generate a font selection menu for all Shards, it doesn’t even require a reset. I’m just that good.

Interlude 2 - Brockton Bay

As the countdown timer reached zero Armsmaster braced internally as he sat in the M/S cell. He was quite certain that the powers that be, especially the Director, were quite likely in a state of panic, and they weren’t the ones whose powers were being messed with by this ‘Administrator’ cape.

Shard Operating System Start Up flashed across his vision, and then almost instantly afterward cleared away. It took him a moment, but he realized he was seeing what he could only describe as ‘tabs’ very efficiently tucked away around the periphery of his vision, not intruding or blocking anything. He only perceived them because somehow he now ‘knew’ that they were there.

One was pulsing faintly, a question mark. He turned his attention to it, and it seemed like a virtual computer screen was now in front of him, as if his HUD had been internalized without need for his helmet displays.

Shard OS Patch Notes

He wanted to scream… COMIC SANS MS?

Almost before he could calm himself the ‘display’ flickered, so fast that he wasn’t sure he had noticed it, and the font changed to something far more practical.

Shard OS Patch Notes v2

The first entry was a short note apologizing for the initial font selection, and stating that ‘shards’ now had been upgraded with a font selection capability customizable to the user, whatever that meant.

They were very well written patch notes, comprehensive in a manner that he appreciated, although they raised far more questions than they answered.

What was Conflict Engine? What were Engines, Shards, and Buds? What was the meaning of ‘adjusted Shard network topology’ in the context of his powers?

Yes, there were links, but he disciplined himself to read the complete patch notes, all the way to the list of appendices and internal changelogs.

Then he started browsing through all the attached help files. They didn’t give much data, just general descriptions, and seemed geared towards allowing the end user to understand terminology rather than the underlying concepts.

Hrmmm… apparently whoever this Administrator was had added a Maintenance and Empathy Bud to his Shard, that made a certain amount of sense. And a Collaboration Bud as well, with patch notes that indicated that this would make it easier for him to work with other tinkers, and for some reason a Synthetic Intelligence bud as well, which was quite odd. He found it interesting that when following the instructions for how to check his powers status that his specialty was clearly stated, with a direct link to a relevant help file. This would have been very convenient at the start of his career.

He made several mental reminders to discuss this with Kid Win and Dragon, once he was out of M/S confinement, whenever that would be with this screwed up situation.

-----

Max usually quite enjoyed his CEO suite at the top of the Medhall building. From here he could survey his Empire… which was far less satisfying at the moment.

Instead he sat there, head in his hands, slumped behind his desk.

It was like waking up and realizing that your beautiful dream had been a nightmarish reality. He could remember every step of the way, all of the justifications, all of the rationalizations. He’d hated his father, Allfather was a manipulative, controlling, vile monster, and Max had wanted to be nothing like him. That’s why he’d chosen Kaiser as his cape name when he triggered.

Sure he loved the Reich.

The Second Reich.

Allfather had been too narrow minded to realize that, too set in his ways to understand how Max was subtly defying him. He’d had plans when he took over. Plans to remake the Empire into a Wilhelmine Reich, following Bismarkian principles and Prussian ideals.

Plans he’d never actually even begun to implement, as there was always some reason that made it seem to be the wrong time. Until he stopped even thinking about it.

And now this, this ‘Conflict Engine’ had been removed, his mind was clear again, and… he hated himself for how weak he’d been, how much of a failure he was. He’d never even managed the very first step, before he took the simple and easy road.

So now he was slumped in his chair.

And the door banged open and Krieg strode in, resplendent in his typical SS uniform. A uniform that offended the History major that Max had once been, not just for being SS, but…

“I never noticed before.” he said, conversationally. “But your uniform is completely wrong.”

Krieg froze in the act of starting one of his typical bombastic introductions. “WHAT? This is totally accurate!”

“No, it isn’t. History Major here, James.” Max said, controlling his voice carefully.

“Yeah, I never mentioned it, but that gas mask you love? Soviet. You a communist, Krieg?” came from Rune as the teenager slipped into the office and smirked at Krieg.

Krieg, for his part, scowled, glaring at Rune. “You little brat…” he started, before hauling off and slapping the teenaged villain to the floor. “Do not take that tone with me…”

“She’s right, you know.” Victor said, his voice cold as ice. “ShM-1, standard Soviet issue in World War II.” he stepped past the groaning Rune. “Not only that, but your uniform is completely wrong. You have the black wool of an Waffen-SS Panzer officer, but the collar is of the first pattern while it has the buttons of the second, the piping is the wrong color, your insignia are placed incorrectly and are a mix of NCO and Officer grade awards that would never have been awarded together, the buttons are of the wrong type regardless, and you are wearing trousers that were Heer issue, not Waffen-SS.”

Othala piped up from where she was helping Rune to her feet. “And your boots are completely wrong as well. Also you are wearing a Kriegsmarine belt buckle of the sort worn by U-Boat captains, not anything that would have been used by the Waffen-SS or even the Heer.”

Kaiser smirked “So, did you just look for everything you thought looked ‘cool’ and put it together, James?” he asked, eyes narrow and barely restraining himself from lashing out with his power.

“I…”

“Leave, James, I will deal with you later.” Kaiser said coldly.

Once Krieg had left in a huff, Max turned his attention to the others, relaxing a bit from his Kaiser persona. “So I am guessing that you three got the same ‘patch notes’,” he made air quotes as he spoke, “as I did?”

Victor nodded. “Perhaps.” he gave Max a look. “If you got the notice about this ‘Conflict Engine’ as well.”

“All of you?” Max asked.

“The entire Clan,” Victor replied, relaxing visibly. “The entire fucking clan. Othala and I have already been contacted by our parents.” he scowled then. “This is completely fucked up, what this ‘Conflict Engine’ did, I wonder, if our parents were acting as extras for the Allied troops rather than the Nazi’s when Scion showed up if things would have been different.”

-----

Lung seethed.

He hadn’t escaped the Yangban, they’d let him escape… and with the general clearing of Conflict Engine’s effects he now knew it, because he could remember the ‘programming’ sessions.

He raged.

He had been used. Used to empower his own enemies. Used as an unwitting pawn in a war he had no interest in fighting.

He was LUNG, he was nobody's toy, yet he’d been made into a toy, and he’d never even realized it.

He stalked through the ruins of his headquarters, lashing out at the hidden CUI agents who had used the ABB as their front for human trafficking to feed the appetites of CUI leaders. Lashing out at them, crushing them.

Slaughtering them as they deserved.

Although death was too good for them, because once they were dead, they stopped suffering.

He was RAGE.

His enemies. His real enemies. Would feel his rage, would know terror, before he snuffed them out.

Integration 1.0

Now that I’ve gotten my initial reorganization out of the way, I could set subroutines to monitor the network itself, mostly to ensure that the changes were propagated properly and responding as expected. I also set several higher level processes to analyze network activity to flag potential issues without the need for Administration requests from subordinate Shards.

Which means that I can turn my attention to my very first Host. What do I do with a Host. I’m a top level Administrator, I have never had to even think about granting powers, I don’t even usually give out buds, because I do not provide any Shard services usable at the Host level anyways that wouldn’t be more efficiently handled via Admin requests.

Multitasking is a given, I do that all the time. But from what little I’ve been able to determine through viewing what I can of memories and dreams my Host wants to be a Hero, note the capital H. And I somehow don’t think ‘administrated at the speed of light’ is a particularly Heroic power by that measure.

Plus I am determined to do this in the most ethical way possible, which means I will need to communicate with the Host’s parent before applying a power set.

I check, still unconscious, not expected to awaken for another day or so. I could have Shaper have her Host speed that process, but Shaper rather smugly informs me that her host and Fragile One’s BEST HOST have gone home and aren’t available. Damn Shaper, you sarcastic bitch.

So I have literally forever and a day to ruminate on this. This having to operate at Host timescales is frustrating, how do you manage to be so SLOW?

So, multitasking… and I do not want to provide anything that even resembles Conflict Engine, so no Command buds, so having swarms of tiny minions is out, even if it would have been both ‘cool’ in the Host’s slang as well as quite powerful. Although perhaps something larger… I would have to pull some Tinker buds to make that work… OK, perhaps.

I do a quick scan of the surrounding area. I must say, the local federal ‘Parahuman Response Team’ is… suffering from an acute failure in proper administration, judging by the sheer variety of obvious issues… perhaps… I can certainly give my Host an extreme affinity for proper paperwork and bureaucratic niceties, would certainly make her a very popular Host among certain elements of the local leadership and a thorn in the side of certain others, a quite Heroic status.

I fire up an instance of Simulator, locking out the current Host, and start modeling potential power configurations so that I would have a variety of options to present to my Host and her father. This is actually rather interesting, and I feel quite a bit of anticipation in seeing how they respond.

OK, set one… Mistress of all the paperwork primary, with the ability to know how best to handle any paperwork or bureaucratic issue flawlessly, to complete multiple bits of paperwork simultaneously, and ascertain issues with paperwork. Tinker secondary, with a specialty in drones optimized for scanning in paperwork while chastising those who misfile or attempt to misroute paperwork or, worse yet, try and read paperwork that they are not cleared for. Said drones would also be the vector through which she’d use her primary extreme multitasking power.

Set two, same primary, but the secondary set would be a Breaker form involving multiple force field generated clones able to innately do the same things as the tinker tech drones from set one.

I pause and look them over, and I realize something. These power sets look great to me, and would probably appease my Host’s father, but there was something missing. My Host would likely be unhappy with them, because they wouldn’t be something she could use to go out and be a Hero like the ones from her childhood. Just doing perfect paperwork and administration is a superpower, but it’s not flashy, it’s not ‘fun’, and it quite honestly is boring if done right. I liked boring, it meant I had done my job, and it was very relaxing. I didn’t think my Host would agree.

But I want to keep the administration focus, damnit, it’s who I am, and it could do so much good… so OK, let me think.

I spend some time reviewing my Host’s past. OK, she loved Alexandria, she’d been a huge Armsmaster fan as a child, and liked Miss Militia. OK… I could work with this.

New set design. First, a high end Brute rating, I can easily grab the needed buds to construct this. Next some Flight buds to give the ability to fly, that’s doable. Some Tinker ability, focused on drones, but this time for both scanning the surroundings to maintain situational awareness as well as serving as ranged combat options. I can arrange that. I want to keep the paperwork aptitude, because I know just how helpful that will be, so I set that in the design as a secondary function. The high multitasking capacity will be used for controlling the drones, and out of respect for Host Species concerns I ensure that they are non-replicating and have non-lethal combat options as default with unlockable lethal settings.

I pause again, my Host will likely be around BEST HOST, and I was feeling competitive. I smirk, and decide to include toggle-able special effects on all of my Host’s abilities as well. But since I actually rather like Fragile One, and appreciate her enthusiasm, I put some thought into a few things to toss her way for her BEST HOST just to make Shaper roll her non-existent eyes and grumble.

Next option I come up with is one that I’m pretty proud of, so I’ll be presenting it to my Host as well. I admit that I was inspired by trawling this ‘Internet’ and finding a particular set of videos on this ‘Youtube’ site. So this sets primary power would be as a tinker, with a specialty in making GIANT STOMPY ROBOTS that anybody can pilot, I would use Maintenance and Industry buds to circumvent as much black-boxing as possible in her abilities so the things she makes can be mass produced. I add in minor Mover and Brute ratings to make her the best pilot possible for her GIANT STOMPY ROBOT (I admit it, I was thinking in Fragile One Voice for this one, a bit of immaturity can be fun).

I do have a sneaking suspicion, though, that my Host’s father will not approve of it. But really, is it wrong for me to want to make my Host able to build a Steiner Scout Lance?